TCATS #498 - The End

My friends.
The time has come to say goodbye. 😢

Today I officially ended my ten+ years in the Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square. My journey out of the Choir is a complicated one and probably a story best suited for another time. But if you've been a faithful reader of this blog, you've probably been able to identify most of the elements that have contributed to my sooner-than-once-expected departure. In March of this year, it became clear to me that I would leave sometime during 2024. And shortly after that, I hatched a specific plan to leave near the end of September-- which would have allowed me to go on one last tour and to sing a few more times in the Tabernacle. But a couple of weeks ago, that plan was rather abruptly and emotionally altered and I knew I could no longer stay.

So, as quietly as possible, and after 1000+ rehearsals and 500+ performances, I left right after today's broadcast while everyone else stayed to rehearse tour music.  After saying hello to my pseudo-nephew Garrett who was in town (and is a huge Choir fan!), I made sure the suits I had worn were free of anything in their pockets; I turned in all of my music; and I left my security badge and car pass in my music locker. I then walked through the Tabernacle halls one last time, accompanied by my good friend Siope, taking a few mental snapshots with my mind and remembering back to those many times I had felt happy and excited to be there. After some good discussion with Siope and after Willy (who I drove in with) was done with his Spirit of God rehearsal, I drove out of the parking lot for the last time and headed home.

Amidst the sadness of today, I also felt a lot of deep gratitude in my heart. Specifically, gratitude for....

1. The People. There were several individuals who I became very close friends with during my time in the Choir. There were others who consistently said hello, gave me a smile, and asked how I was doing every time they saw me. And then there were those who I rarely got to interact with, but who fell into the "familiar face" category and who I respected for their contributions and dedication. But regardless of which "friendship bucket" people were in, I am profoundly grateful for each one of them and how they impacted my life--in so many different and vitally important ways.

2. The Music. It is true that many of the songs I've sung over the past ten years with the Choir no longer bring me the inspiration or spiritual feelings they once did. That said, there are still several that resonate with my soul (and always will). Some of these include: All People That on Earth Do Dwell, It Is Well With My Soul, The Wexford Carol, Psalm 148, Brother James' Air, Simple Gifts, My Song in the Night, His Voice as The Sound, Nella Fantasia, Alleluia (Caccini), We Thank Thee Lord for This New Day, One Person, Hold On, and Fill the World With Love. These songs and several others lifted me, encouraged me, and made me feel seen and loved. 

3. The Experiences. The experiences that stand out the most to me are three-fold. First, the Christmas concerts. These concerts were always filled with beautiful music, wonder, awe, excitement, and reverence. I will be forever grateful to have been a part of them.
Second, the tours. The tours (despite the stress and difficult emotions they caused) helped provide opportunities to get to know choir members better and to love and serve those around the world. They opened my eyes to the universal power of music on a grander scale.
Third, the many meaningful conversations, hugs of encouragement, and lightheartedness that occurred during the rehearsal/performance breaks are moments that will always be treasured. And now that I think about it, an added fourth to this list would be the unique connection I'd feel standing next to a good friend while singing a soul-resonating song we both loved. It's a feeling that I suspect is impossible to replicate in any other way.

In closing, I could make a rather long list of things I won't miss, haha, but I'd prefer ending my final blog entry on a more positive note. 

One of the most important lessons I've learned during the past ten years is the powerful impact just one person can make. Over and over and over again, it was easy for my brain to side with the seemingly logical argument that because I was only one amongst 400+ other singers, that I didn't really matter--that my voice (and everything that makes me, me) didn't matter. This argument was compounded by decades of shame and self-hatred and voices crying out in my head "Of course you don't matter."

But I do matter!
We all do!

This has been true through my entire journey behind the notes.  
And it will continue to be true in my current faith and life journey to "destination unknown."

ANY TIME we connect with another human being with the intention to uplift, to love, to understand, and to respect, something very meaningful takes place. Perhaps one of the most meaningful things of all.

Thank you so much for adding your witness to this journey I've been on with the Tabernacle Choir. And a special shout-out to my ex-wife, to my children, and to my closest friends. Your love and support have been amazing.

Whether in this life or the next, God be with you 'till we meet again. 🫶

 

PS: To my fellow choir members: my apologies if you felt slighted in me not telling you I was leaving. It just needed to be this way. Thanks for your understanding.

TCATS #497 - Of Derrick, Tickets, and the Olympics

Last Sunday, I was observing the Choir from the audience seats since I wasn't eligible to sing in the broadcast (I had missed Thursday's rehearsal). For some reason, I decided to sit on the 2nd row of the section--which is odd because I normally sit much farther back. As I sat there, I noticed plenty of staff members busy doing a variety of things to make sure everything was going to go smoothly. I also noticed Derrick Porter (the new voice of the Spoken Word) among them and didn't think much of it until he ended his conversations and came over and introduced himself to me and a friend I was sitting next to. For the next 5-7 minutes, he and I talked about various ways that kind of connected us (he saw my name tag and asked about other Pitt individuals I was related to and things launched from there). Apparently my dad was the one who helped convert someone who later became Derrick's mission president. And that mission president had a son who, it turns out, I ended up hiring at IBM back in the early 90s. It was also discovered that he had gone to school with my sister. Anyway, he was very friendly, very kind, and I was honestly in awe of how much time he took to talk with me. We even exchanged a few texts later that day and he said some things that were very helpful and insightful to me personally as I continue to figure out my life and which path I want to end up on. 

All to say, I'm thoroughly impressed with Derrick Porter and very much look forward to hearing all of the future Spoken Word messages he'll be sharing with the world. He doesn't just talk the talk. He walks the walk. He's a Christ-like person who I'm honored to call friend.

---------------

In other, not so uplifting news, I've been really frustrated with the way the Church has handled the distribution of tickets to concerts being held in Florida and Georgia (our tour destination in September). There's been zero official communication to the Choir about the tickets and when I went onto the website to get some the first day they were available, the site was asking for a code. What code?! I finally was able to bypass that and request some tickets--only to get an email saying "Thanks for requesting tickets to an upcoming Tabernacle Choir event. More information regarding your request for tickets will be sent by the hosting arena."

Sigh.

After waiting a couple of weeks, we finally received this internal info: "IF tickets become available, we will provide a code...".

Thankfully, a Choir staff member put me in contact with another staff member who tried to explain why this hadn't been rolled out very well and asked me to send him an email with my ticket request. He said he'd see what he can do. At least it's something. Something I'll put my hope in.

I get that the Church has every right to withhold tickets so they can be given to non-members in the hopes that they will be inspired and want to know more about the Church. But I don't think it's unreasonable to ask that a block of tickets be reserved for friends/family of Choir members who happen to live in the areas we'll be visiting. There may be important reasons why such friends and family members are being invited. As is the case for me.

----------------

In my last thought for today, I wanted to give a nod to the Choir's performance of "Call of the Champions" today. It was very inspiring. Composer John Williams can seriously do no wrong. He's brilliant--and this music of his was perfect today as we look forward to watching the Summer Olympics play out soon in France. It was nice, too, for the Choir to end the broadcast on this song. 

And that's it, folks. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #496 - Messages from the Moutains

Today's MSW theme was all about mountains--including not only some of the songs we sang, but the spoken message itself. I thought it would be fun to do a little critical analysis of all of the messages we received today about mountains. 

First off, let's tackle the three songs about mountains:

ANYONE CAN MOVE A MOUNTAIN 

Anyone can move a mountain if he really tries.
Anyone can move a mountain, [but] you must realize it will take a little time, [and] a lot of faith. [So] make up your mind and you'll arrive at where you strive to go.

So never be afraid to dream for that's what you must do.
If you never dream at all then your dreams can't come true.
Anyone can move a mountain, everyone should know. Just believe it and you'll find it's so.

Analysis: At a very high level, I appreciate what this song is telling us. It's attempting to bolster our confidence in the notion that we can move the mountains in our lives. We can conquer hardships and come out on top. But honestly, this isn't always the case. There are some mountains we cannot move. The song's lyrics are implying that mountains (trials) absolutely can be moved (overcome) if we have enough faith, if we just believe, and if we strive hard enough. I don't agree. And I know many people in my life whose mental health would suffer if they put their belief in this song's message. Should we try to overcome trials? Sure. And there are many we will overcome. But we need to remember that this song's formula doesn't ALWAYS work. (As an aside, there's a logical fallacy in saying that dreams can't come true if you never dream. Because if you don't dream at all, then there are no dreams to come true or not come true...)

CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

Climb every mountain, search high and low.
Follow every byway, every path you know.

Climb every mountain, ford every stream.
Follow every rainbow,‘till you find your dream.

A dream that will need all the love you can give,
Every day of your life for as long as you live.

Analysis: For me, this is a song about figuring out life. It's about taking opportunities (and proactively making opportunities) to gain experiences and figure out what you really want. Such a course of action will include ups and downs, a lot of dedication and love, and a lot of hope and luck as well. So no doubt this song is inspiring (and I usually get a few chills when I sing it). However, on the flip side, using the word "every" repeatedly in this song can sometimes cause me to feel sad and frustrated and critical of myself. If I don't climb every mountain and every byway and every path and every rainbow each and every day, I'm not going to find what I'm looking for--I'm not going to be happy. It's a lot of pressure! Don't mess up! Don't let opportunities pass you by or else! (As an aside, the lyric "every path you know" doesn't quite seem to fit with the rest of the song since it's likely we'd be trying paths we don't know on our journey to find our end goal.)

ON GREAT LONE HILLS 

On great, lone hills, where tempests brood and gather
Primeval Earth, against primeval sky,
We, faring forth, possessed by fervent longing,
Have found a throne, eternal and high.
Have knelt at last in wordless adoration,
Till fire and whirlwind have both gone by.

With ardent song we greet the golden morning.
By faith upborne, remember not the night.
The whole wide world, triumphant hails the dawning.
God walks abroad in garments of might,
The hills, behold, are now a path of splendor,
Transfigured all, and all crowned with light.

Analysis: Ok, ok. So "hills" are not "mountains". I agree. But let's just go with it, shall we? It's difficult to analyze this song because I'm not entirely sure what it's talking about. But I'll do my best. The first set of lyrics seems to paint a very bleak picture about life. It's like we start our life's journey without God and encounter a lot of difficult realities and trials. But because of our intense longing to find a higher power, we end up accomplishing that and kneel in humility before the God who loves us.

The next set of lyrics paints a much happier picture now that we have God in our lives. We see the world around us for what it is--evidence of God's love. In fact, we see God everywhere. And the lone hills are now hills that if crossed, lead to light, truth, and goodness. 

Anyway, I'm on board with the lyrics, although I find myself wishing for two things. First, whereas I've had the time to study these lyrics and ponder on the meanings of various words used here, most listeners don't have that luxury. So using less-common words (brood, primeval, faring, ardent, upborne, etc) makes it difficult (for some, at least) to understand the overall message. Second, I take issue with "remember not the night." I may be way off base here with interpreting that line, but often "night" is associated with negative emotions like confusion, pain, and hardship. But let's not forget that pain leads to growth and further understanding. The "nights" in our lives are not something to forget.

Well, this is turning into a very long post. So I'll just end with a sentence or two from the spoken word I liked the most. 

"Maybe it’s not the elevation of the peak but the work it took to get there that brings us closer to God. It’s our willingness to climb the mountain—-not just the mountain-—that’s sacred to the Lord." (Derrick Porter, 6/30/24)

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #495 - Hello Derrick Porter

Derrick Porter.
He's the new guy in town. 

For at least a few loyal fans of Music & the Spoken Word, I'm sure the transition from Lloyd to Derrick has been met with a little hesitancy and trepidation. After all, 34 years is a long time. Lloyd's style, his voice, his smile, his insights, and his convictions have all given way to a certain brand of familiarity and trust. And that's hard for loyalists to let go of. 

But, as they say, all good things must come to an end.

Derrick started things out by greeting the audience members this morning. Shortly thereafter, the program started. His spoken word message was all about the transition, as well addressing topics of connection, joy, and focusing on Christ. Personally, I think he did a nice job and look forward to hearing more from him. I especially appreciated his message today about connection.

Having Derrick as the Spoken Word host wasn't the only thing that changed today. Elements of the program itself also changed. Instead of Derrick introducing the program like Lloyd Newell did during the first 30 seconds, there is now a woman's voice that does that. The same woman also closes out the program at the end. Some guys next to me today, after hearing the voice, said it sounded AI-generated. While I hope that's not the case, I can see why it might be. Since she only speaks less than probably 20 seconds total, using AI for timing and convenience purposes might have been why they chose to go with that option. I'll see if I can find out for sure.

For me personally, today's experience with the Tabernacle Choir was okay. I seemed to be plagued with fighting off some voices in my head telling me I shouldn't be there and nobody wanted me there. Also for some reason, I was in a very reclusive mood and didn't really say all that much to anyone. I did add one change of my own to the program though. It's the first time I wore glasses. The words on the teleprompter were becoming increasingly hard to see, so I thought it was about time. I've had glasses for years but just rarely wear them. Now though, with words becoming blurry, I had a definite need for increased clarity. And I very much enjoyed the change.

Looking to the future, I only have about 15-20 Sundays left in my choir service. It's a strange thought, but the time has come. The voices in my head are winning, my views about the Church are changing, and to be honest, I just really miss my friend Wes. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #494 - Personal Guests & Farewell to Lloyd

I had the privilege of having my mother and my great aunt join me for rehearsal this past Thursday. As choir members, we can invite people we know to come on Thursday nights and have them enjoy a "Tabernacle Choir experience". They sit in the loft next to all of us, they are given music to read from, and then near the end of rehearsal they are introduced to the Choir by Mack himself. Mack bases these introductions off of a short biography each guest is asked to write up and submit beforehand.

At any rate, it was fun to see both of them have such a good experience. And it was fun riding home with them afterwards to hear their perspective on what they thought about it all. Their comments centered on how much they enjoyed the music, the people sitting next to them (who were all very kind and accommodating), and getting to testify of Christ as they sang the music. They were also struck on how "get down to business" Mack was and how carefully they had to listen to make sure they were understanding all of the instructions being given. 

Around 9:05 or so and after the introductions, the guests were excused from the loft while the rest of the choir continued rehearsing. I left with the guest group and once we were down near the front of the audience seats, one of the Choir photographers took a picture of my mom and aunt Winnie and then a picture of all of us (including my brother Jordan who had come). We talked a bit with the Pres. and Sis. Porter (who my mom knew from years ago) and then we left! 

Personally, along with seeing my mom and aunt so happy, it was nice to have something "new" as part of my Thursday Choir experience. It also made me a little more grateful for having the opportunity to sing with the Choir in the first place.

Switching gears, today was Lloyd Newell's last broadcast. For the past 34 years, he's been the voice of Music & the Spoken Word and as you can imagine, he and his wife were a bit emotional today as they said goodbye to this very significant part of their lives. Lloyd had hand-picked the song selections today and the spoken word appropriately focused on CHANGE. 

Several choir members around me got a little emotional as we sang "God Be With You 'Til We Meet Again" to Bro. & Sis. Newell as a final farewell. While I was thankful for his service and consider him a brilliant writer and speaker (he composed over 1700 spoken word messages or mini-sermons during his tenure), I didn't find myself getting too emotional. I acknowledge I have been touched on numerous occasions from his spoken word messages, but I also look forward to seeing how Derrick Porter (his replacement) will fill his shoes. Maybe he'll walk in the same style as Lloyd. Or maybe, just maybe, he'll do things a little differently. 

Oh, and before I end this entry, it was announced on Thursday that the Choir's next tour destination (next Feb) is Lima, Peru. I won't be around for that one, but I'm glad the Choir gets to go to such a beautiful destination and mingle with/sing to the people there. 

Until next time, God be with you.

L to R: brother Jordan, my mom Linda, Aunt Winnie, and me!

TCATS #493 - Of Holst and Parades

There are two thoughts I wanted to share today regarding my experience this week in the Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square.

First, out of all of the songs we sang, my favorite was titled "O God Beyond All Praising", by Gustav Holst. The song is based on the THAXTED tune, which Gustav came up with himself (and which tune has been used for several other songs over the years). Thaxted is actually the name of an English village where Holst grew up. At any rate, it's a very pretty song and one that found a way into my soul this morning. The lyrics that Michael Perry came up with for the song are certainly praiseworthy, but for some reason just the tune itself is what impacted me the most. It seemed to strengthen my tether to the Divine.

Second, one of our Choir presidency members stood before us this morning and informed us that music turn-in was canceled (which is rare if one has been scheduled) and that we were encouraged not to go over to the Tabernacle because of the Pride parade that was happening fairly close by. We were also told that if we really did need to go over there, that we weren't to take any pictures. 

Without any further background or context or explanation given, I was left to try and figure out the reasons behind this request. From a risk management perspective, perhaps the Choir presidency was trying to avoid the unlikely possibility of one of the parade-watchers being unkind to a choir member (or vice versa)? That somehow choir members wouldn't be welcome to view the festivities? That, because of our large numbers, we'd get in the way of others wanting to participate? Or was it to avoid a potential PR issue in the which choir members were photographed or videoed by the media as they watched the parade--thereby implicitly showing their support of the LGBTQ+ community? I don't know. I wish some additional details had been provided because it felt a little like we were being asked not to support the parade and thus the community it represents. 

Funny thing is, since the west gate of Temple Square was closed (which was nearest the parade), if we had returned our music, we would have had to go through the north gate which would have kept us quite a bit away from the parade. And speaking of the parade, it was actually taking place on 1st south--a block away from Temple Square (blocks in SLC are quite large). Anyway, it was just one of those times I was confused and in the absence of an explanation, was left to feel a bit offended. 

If I'm wrong in my interpretation of what was said, I'll be the first to apologize. Just trying to make sense of it all.

After the parking garage at the Conference Center was mostly cleared out and Choir members had gone home, I walked over to the parade to show support generally, but also to support someone I knew who was participating in it. Along with the excitement and energy, my friend in the parade summed it up best with a text he sent me: "Today I experienced a community of love and support well beyond anything I've ever experienced [elsewhere]. Most of all, there [was] no judgment here."

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #492 - Specials No More

 At Thursday night's rehearsal this past week, things were going exactly as they usually go. We rehearsed each piece, cleaned it up, and tape & timed it for the upcoming broadcast. The last piece we rehearsed was the piece that gave us a Grammy award back in the 1950s: Battle Hymn of the Republic.

As we rehearsed that one, Mack, at one point, said something to the effect that "Even though we don't do specials anymore, with it being Memorial Day weekend, I thought I'd add this one to the program. There are those who will get why, and for everyone else, they'll just think it's a nice song."

It was the first time that I had officially heard we don't do specials anymore. 

That said, it's been evident that we haven't been doing specials for nearly a year now (or longer?) I remember last July when we did Music & the Spoken Word right before the upcoming Independence Day holiday here in the US. I was anticipating the program to be full of patriotic music like has been the case in the past. But it was not. And for all of the holidays that followed (minus Christmas & Easter), such as Thanksgiving, Veteran's Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, etc., the songs we sang were not catered to celebrate those special occasions. 

Just today, one of the Choir members made the comment "I miss patriotic music broadcasts". And there were others who chimed in with "Me too". I don't know that I personally miss them too much, but I recognize that there is some really fun and inspiring patriotic music which does do a very successful job at initiating a sense of wonder and appreciation for the good parts of our country and for those who have sacrificed to preserve freedoms.

As I was pondering this discontinuation of specials topic, I was reminded of an opportunity Choir members were given back in 2022 to provide feedback to the Choir presidency. Up until that time, feedback and suggestions were discouraged and flat out unwanted. Now that they were actually asking for it, I decided to capitalize on the opportunity and provide seven suggestions. One of them was this:

"Along with efforts to provide Music & the Spoken Word in Spanish and Portuguese, I hope there will be some consideration on discontinuing or modifying the US-centric broadcasts that highlight US holidays. I fully realize that there is a lot of great music that is sung and played at these, but can we not focus on themes, principles, and messages that apply to all countries and people? For example, this past Veterans Day broadcast could include songs that speak of freedom, sacrifice, and patriotism while at the same time leaving out specific references to the United States or America."

I don't mean to imply, at all, that my suggestion had anything to do with the Choir Presidency's decision to discontinue Specials. They were probably already talking about it given that one of their directives was to be more internationally focused. Evidences of that have included inviting individuals from all over the world to join the Choir for General Conference twice a year, broadcasting Music & the Spoken Word in Spanish (and Portuguese soon), and embarking on a multi-year effort to tour other countries. 

Anyway, just an observation. Sorry for writing so much about it!

I wish there was more to report, but honestly the Choir just continues to do the weekly broadcast and not much else. It will do so for two more months before something extra will be added: having additional rehearsals for our upcoming tour to Florida/Georgia. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #491 - Carpool +1

My Tabernacle Choir experience began with carpooling to Temple Square with Ben back in 2014. A few years later, 2017, we added Willy and Alan. Since then, our carpool has remained unchanged....until today.

Willy connected the dots that one of the new members of the Choir who joined just this year, lives in West Bountiful--and literally less than a mile from our carpool meeting spot (shout out to the restaurant Ramblin' Roads, whose parking lot we've utilized for over ten years now!). So he extended the invitation to him to join us and lo and behold, he did.

So, with a warm welcome we say hello to Dan! And from our conversations with Dan today, we learned he is a 2nd Tenor, he's originally from Arizona, he's a food research scientist specializing in formulating cookies (which recipes are then purchased by entities in the food business), and he sang in BYU Men's Chorus from 2009 to 2015. Dan is an extremely friendly guy and adds an excitement to our carpool that we're all grateful for. 

In other news, the Choir shifted early from the Tabernacle to the Conference Center today because apparently some work on the organ needed to be performed sooner than later. I'm not a big fan of singing in the Conference Center. I feel very small and disconnected from those who come to watch us. (And when I'm in row 6, add "squished" to the "very small" comment) However, it's all out of necessity to accommodate the larger number of people who visit Temple Square during the summer months.

Lastly for today, this year marks the first year since I started singing with the Choir that extra rehearsals won't outnumber regular rehearsals. It's an oddly quiet year. Normally we're always preparing for some next event outside of our weekly broadcast. But unless our leaders alter the current calendar (which is certainly a possibility), we really have nothing until our tour to Georgia/Florida in September. Even the traditional summer concert that the Choir has been putting on for years and years, has been canceled this year. 

I don't know...
It's all a bit strange...

That's it for this week!
Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #490 - To God Be the Glory

There isn't a lot to comment on regarding this week's choir experience. I was absent Thursday night (celebrating my ex-wife's 50th birthday) which meant that today I had the opportunity to observe the rehearsal and broadcast from the designated balcony seats. Unfortunately, I didn't really feel a lot--which makes it hard to figure out what to write about today. But I thought I'd highlight one of the songs the Choir sang today which is a lovely new piece that Ryan Murphy arranged. It's called "To God Be the Glory". 

This particular song (words by Fanny Crosby, music by William Doane) became a popular hymn after it was programmed in Billy Graham’s Crusades of the 1950s--though it was first published in the year 1875. As the popularity of the song grew, it began to be included in most Christian churches' hymnbooks (though of course, it wasn't included in ours). 

I thought it was interesting that in Ryan's arrangement, some words were added/altered. Particularly, all of verse 2 has been replaced with lyrics from another song called "We Praise Thee, We Bless Thee". Interestingly enough, the lyrics for that song also come from Fanny Crosby.

While this is purely speculation on my part, I would guess that verse 2 was replaced because gospel doctrine of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints does not teach that a person, from the very moment they believe in Christ, will automatically receive forgiveness. Belief in Christ needs to be coupled with good works, and the work of repentance must be undertaken before that forgiveness is given.

Verse 2 does have some things to be appreciated though. Christ's atonement is a perfect redemption. The promises of God are real. Christ loves all who believe in Him. And those who do believe, regardless of what they've done, can absolutely tap into Christ's grace--from that very first moment of belief, throughout their ensuing journey.

If I got the opportunity to make some edits myself, I'd change what I've highlighted in red. Because, after all, we do believe in a Heavenly Mother and I have absolutely no doubt that She has, with our Father, done many great things for each of us.

Verse 1
To God be the glory, great things He hath They have done;
So loved He They the world that He They gave us His Their Son,
Who yielded His life an atonement for sin,
And opened the life gate that all may go in.

Refrain
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord,
Let the earth hear His voice!
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord,
Let the people rejoice!
O come to the Father our Parents, through Jesus the Son,
And give Him Them the glory, great things He hath They have done.

Verse 2
O perfect redemption, the purchase of blood,
To every believer the promise of God;
The vilest offender who truly believes,
That moment from Jesus a pardon receives.

All honor and praise to Thy excellent name.
Thy love is unchanging, forever the same.
We bless and adore Thee our Heavenly King.
With joy and thanksgiving Thy mercies we sing.

Verse 3
Great things He hath taught us, great things He hath done,
And great our rejoicing through Jesus the Son;
But purer, and higher, and greater will be
Our wonder, our rapture transport, when Jesus we see.
 

 Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #489 - New Kids on the TabChoir Block

I went to Choir Thursday night feeling rather low. The seating chart had come out earlier that day and as soon as I noticed it, emotions hit all over again from last week and I just cried. However, I was bolstered up by the fact that I was assigned to sit next to my good friend Siope and my good friend Dave.  But an hour or two before rehearsal, Siope regretted to inform me that he wouldn't be able to make it. :(

Still, there was Dave!

Until there wasn't. As I sat there in my seat and my watch read 6:59 PM, it was clear Dave wasn't going to show up either.

And then all I could think about was Wes filling one of those empty seats.

Warm-ups started and Farrell (one of our seating managers) started rearranging everyone to fill in the empty spots. He moved me to the aisle seat and then asked one of the new guys, Andrew, to come sit next to me.  

Andrew is just one of 30+ new members to officially join the Choir after completing Choir School this past week. I blog about this event every year because it's a significant happening and because usually the excitement of these new folks helps infuse new life into the Choir's overall energy level. 

I talked to Andrew a little bit, trying to make him feel welcome. He lives in Utah County, tried out for the Choir on a whim, and is a choral conductor at a junior high. Or used to be--since I overheard him saying today that he just got a new job. He's also got to be one of our youngest members I'd think. Don't know for sure, but I'd be surprised if he's a day over 27. :)

I guess I should thank Andrew, actually. Knowing he was new sort of forced me out of my sad mood and helped me focus on trying to be friendly and helpful as we worked our way through the music. And today, it being his first broadcast and all, I remembered back to my own first broadcast and how nervous and excited I was. 

So thanks, Andrew. You're a good guy, a great musician, sang the songs perfectly today, and will fit right in with the rest of us basses. 

And to all the other new people, welcome! May the excitement and energy you felt today continue to be with you in the months and years to come. And when things start to become commonplace and the routine has set in and you've sung songs over 15-20 times, may you be able to reach down inside yourself and restore the excitement and energy you once felt.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

Patrick and I. We sent this to Wes today telling him we missed him.

 

TCATS #488 - Wes

I first met Wes in June of 2018. He had started his choir experience earlier that year, but even though he also sang bass, our paths never really crossed until the seating manager put us together one Thursday night. I remember the feeling I had when I sat next to him and after we had talked a little bit: lighter. Sort of like all the burdens I was carrying weren't so heavy anymore. I remember telling him afterwards something like "I don't know if fate will sit us together again, but I sure hope so."  He smiled at that and said "I hope so too!"

Little did either of us know that fate certainly intended to do just that. Over and over and over again for the next six years. In fact, it actually became unusual that we didn't sit together--even for concerts and General Conference. The times we weren't together though, we were still near each other, and we quickly fell into the routine of talking before rehearsals, giving commentary on the music we were singing, and then walking back to our cars after it was over--which gave us a chance to catch up on the highlights of each others' lives. And since Wes is one who always appreciates openly giving and receiving hugs, we'd end with one of those before saying goodbye.

That's how things played out year in and year out. Occasionally we'd text during the week just to check in, talk about life happenings and our families, and talk about 80s pop/alternative music (which we both loved). 

I'm not exactly sure why our friendship worked so well from an external perspective. Wes is a much different type of person than I am. He's extroverted and checks almost every box for yellow personalities:

Optimism
Enthusiasm
Talking with others
Spontaneous in actions and decisions
Creative
Persuasive
Sociable

Wes also really likes sports. All sorts of sports. Not really playing them so much (though I know he plays some), but watching them and knowing the make-up of teams, who's who, and how they perform week to week (especially BYU). I even think his dream job would be to become one of those sportscasters, providing all of the background commentary on sporting events as they happen real-time.

Wes is also a solid, orthodox member of the Church, and a young dad with three little kids at home which makes for a very busy life. I remember how that was for me over twenty years ago...

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that even though I don't match up with any characteristics or commonalities as described above, our friendship just works. And the thing I've benefited the very most from our friendship heralds back to what I noticed the first time I met him: his ability to lift me up, to paint the world in brighter colors, to help me focus on the good, and to help me feel like things are all going to work out. I can't begin to tell you what a lifeline Wes became for me, especially as I had so many life challenges I was going through.

I think our friendship worked, too, because singing songs that touch our souls, side by side, can't help but form a bond. Particularly when there's such a solid friendship to begin with. The sacred music just builds on that friendship and it becomes something that's not explicitly talked about that often, but exists as this invisible thread...

[Sigh]

So...with all that as a background, yesterday I said good-bye to him. I stood next to him as he sang his last broadcast. I cried as we sang the last song: "Come Thou Fount". I couldn't help but think of all the "little" things--all Wes-related--that have made my choir experience what it has come to be. 

As I gave him a final hug following the Release Program, he gave me one of his big smiles and a reminder that this wasn't "goodbye" just "see you later".  

I walked back to the car as more tears came. And those tears continued throughout the day as I tried to picture how my Choir-Minus-Wes experience would be in the weeks ahead. 

I'll end with a few things I'll miss most about my friend, along with a few of my favorites pics of us.

*I’ll miss the fist bumps we'd do after successfully performing songs.
*I’ll miss witnessing his kind, genuine, and sincere interactions with others.
*I’ll miss the back-and-forth commentary we made on certain songs we sang.
*I’ll miss seeing the reactions of all of the people he complimented everywhere he went.
*I’ll miss his shared sympathies when we'd sing the two songs we mutually dislike the most: “I Think the World is Glorious” and “He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands”.
*I’ll miss his smile, optimism and laughter.
*I’ll miss our impromptu singing and talking about 80s songs.
*I’ll miss shooting the breeze with him during the breaks.
*I’ll miss knowing that someone will always be waiting for me.
*I’ll miss his bro hugs.

Take care my friend!
You changed my life.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

 

 

TCATS #487 - Worked Until it Didn't

I'm going to save my tribute to Wes until next Sunday seeing as how that will be the official day he leaves the Choir. That said, for some reason my emotions didn't want to join my tribute and wait until next Sunday.

Instead, they showed up during this past Thursday night's rehearsal. 

It's true that there were several things on Thursday--during the day--that caused my tear ducts to get warmed up. Part of that had to do with where I'm at in life. The other part came from watching a tv series that depicted a lot of teens going through some really hard things in life. I easily get sad when I see or hear about all of the difficult things people have to endure. Sometimes I even tear up when I'm out and about (particularly at Walmart) as I see the wear and tare of life reflected on the faces of many people. 

But I digress.

I went to Thursday night's rehearsal feeling OK. My tears had stopped from previous events and I was looking forward to sitting next to Wes and engaging with the music. That worked until it didn't. About 2/3rds of the way through, I just started imagining Choir without my Choir best friend and it went downhill from there. My mouth got all quivery (as it does) so I couldn't sing and my tears started up again.  Even though I tried to push it all away, it wouldn't go away. Wes tried helping me out the best he could, but it almost made it worse because it was just one more thing I was going to miss (his continual efforts to help me feel better about whatever is going on in my life). By the end of the rehearsal, I was ready to go home. 

I walked to the music lockers with him and he gave me a hug and then we started walking to the outside door. He had to stay after to get a little video taken (which they do for all of those being released from the Choir) so I just started for the door but he pulled me back and gave me another hug as my tears just kept coming. UG! I don't mind being an emotional person, but sometimes it's entirely inconvenient! As I walked to my car trying to hide my face from others around me, I got to the car and just sobbed until Willy and Ben came (it had been my turn to drive our carpool). 

After getting home, I had no more tears left. The day had taken its toll. Wes was nice enough to send a follow-up text expressing hope that I'd be OK. Indeed I will be OK. Life is full of just being OK, isn't it? If YOU are one of the lucky ones who actually has more net positive days than hard ones, well, good for you. Sometimes I wish I were you.

At any rate, the broadcast today went well. Things were all pretty positive and I just tried to enjoy the experience. During the break, Wes, Patrick, and Matt and I walked around the Temple Square grounds enjoying the beautiful weather and the beautiful flowers. Wes had several people come up to him sharing their well-wishes  (which was probably a result of Mack having all of the members who were leaving stand up in rehearsal today to be recognized). We took a few pics and then went back in to perform for the world. 

After the performance was over, we just sat there. Wes looked over at me with a smile and said "Yeah, I know". To which I said "yeah, it's weird." Referring of course to the fact that he has one Music & the Spoken Word left. Ever. He's done about 175 of them, give or take, and now he is down to just one more.

Change. I know it's part of the natural order of things and is tied into the rhythm of life. But man! It's hard. 

Until next time, God be with you.

Me, Patrick, Matt, & Wes

TCATS #486 - Derrick Porter & BYU Singers

Every year we have one Music & the Spoken Word  episode that features the BYU Singers. And today's episode just happened to be THAT episode. As is always the case, the Singers did a beautiful job not only singing with the Tabernacle Choir, but singing their two solo pieces as well. I was commenting to a friend during the break that the Singers look so young. Sometimes I get into this mindset that if I went back to a college campus, I'd fit right in still! But the truth is, I wouldn't. Some say I look younger than I really am, but I'm definitely not that  young. 

Favorite song on the program today? "Thou Gracious God, Whose Mercy Lends". It's beautiful. And as one YouTube commentator said, "It just gives me goosebumps". 

Also today, the Choir and Orchestra was introduced to the new Music & the Spoken Word  host, replacing Lloyd Newell after 34 years. The new host is Derrick Porter. There were numerous articles published this past week talking about Derrick, but unfortunately, the only things said about him were summed up in this sentence: "Porter, 42, resides in Bountiful, Utah. He and his wife, Rebecca, are the parents of six children. He currently serves as a bishop in his local congregation." (Church of Jesus Christ Newsroom, 3/22/24)

Job? Hobbies? Passions? Other life experiences? How did Derrick get onto the selection radar? What makes him tick?

There was none of that mentioned, but a little internet research discovered that Derrick is actually the CEO of Beauty Industry Group. The description of this group per LinkedIn is as such: "Beauty Industry Group (BIG) is a holding company that owns and operates businesses uniquely poised for success within the beauty industry. BIG has developed a multi-channel, multi-brand strategy operating a multitude of brands with locations in 6 countries selling to more than 100,000 consumers and stylists."

Also, this notable achievement: "Ernst & Young (EY) has named Derrick Porter, CEO of Beauty Industry Group (BIG), Entrepreneur of The Year® 2020 Award in the Utah region. The coveted award, which was granted at a virtual celebration on October 2, honors entrepreneurs and leaders of high-growth companies who are excelling in areas including innovation, financial performance and personal commitment to their businesses and communities, while also transforming our world. Porter was selected by a panel of independent judges." (PR Newswire, 10/21/20)

Anyway, I'm not entirely sure what qualifies him to be an executive producer, principal writer, and presenter for the MSW program, but we all warmly welcomed him and his wife today as they spent just a few minutes introducing themselves and sharing their excitement for this opportunity. I'm sure he'll be great.

That's about it for today. A shout out to my buddy Wes who has been sick the past couple of days and therefore couldn't join us for today's festivities. Get well soon, friend!

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #485 - The Choir & Me

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately.

About a lot of things. 

And one of those things is how much longer I'd like to continue being a member of the Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square. 

I've been in the Choir for a good ten years now and it's been a good run. This blog has documented all of the grand experiences I've had, along with all of the challenging ones. All in all, I'm sure to look back on the Choir with a lot of fond memories. Being able to serve my fellow human beings in this capacity has really been a dream come true. 

That said, I don't want to turn this into a farewell post, because it's really not. But I do want to document my plans moving forward as 2024 will definitely be my last year.

Amidst my ponderings, I was trying to decide which month would be the best to make my exit. In that pondering process, I had the impression to stay until the next tour is over--which will be in September. Three reasons seemed to surface: I promised someone several months ago that I'd be their roommate for the next tour (the one to Florida/Georgia), so I want to honor that commitment. Also, I have a brother who lives just about an hour away from the State Farm arena where we'll be performing our concert, and he said he'd come watch it. Which is kind of a big deal seeing as how this brother is my youngest brother (twenty years younger) and he and I really haven't had too many conversations or shared experiences in our lifetimes. So, being able to connect with him in this way would be a really good thing. Lastly, I want to give tour one more shot to see if I can remain emotionally stable. Plus, it'll give me a good opportunity to say goodbye to people and thank them for their friendship and camaraderie. 

I suppose a fourth reason would be to give me time to decide what I'm going to do to fill the empty hole left behind once I leave. Join a different choir? Find a place to volunteer at? Spend more time with family? Lots of options. 

Shifting gears, I just wanted to make a couple of comments on today's MSW performance. If you were at the Tabernacle, you would have seen a fairly "normal" MSW. If you were watching or listening from home, you would have seen us performing from the Philippines. :) We did record an episode there, so the one we actually performed today will be used during the time we're in Florida/Georgia.  Also...a very rare thing happened today that's only happened once before: I got to sit next to my friend Willy--who normally sits at least three or four seats over in baritone/2nd tenor land. While I loved sitting next to Wes for at least part of the rehearsal, Wes eventually got moved down a row. And his replacement was Willy. Anyway, that will surely not happen again, so I was grateful.

And that, as they say, is that.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

PS: Here are a couple of screenshots from our Philippines MSW...

 

TCATS #484 - The Philippines Tour

Hey there friends. I'm a little late in posting about my experience in the Philippines, but now that all of the media hype has died down a little bit, perhaps this is as good a time as any. Before diving into it though, I do want to give you a few links if you're interested.

First is a link to one of the concerts we performed at the Mall of Asia Arena. This link should be active for at least a year. If you're short on time, I'd check out the following two segments/songs. For me personally, these were the highlights.

Youth presentation/If You Believe/Hawak Kamay (16 min)

Bahay Kubo (4 min)

Also, if you're interested, I put together a 40 min highlights video that includes photos taken by me/others, news coverage from the church/KSL, various Facebook reels, etc. You can view that HERE, via my Google drive.

Some personal thoughts and experiences: 

**First and foremost, I want to say how welcomed and loved I felt by the Filipino people. From the minute we stepped off the plane to when we got back on it, everyone I met and saw and interacted with was loving, kind, and incredibly grateful. It was very impactful for me.

**The concerts were a highlight to perform. And when we sang the two songs in Tagalog that they were really familiar with (Hawak Kamay and Bahay Kubo), the audience went crazy. After the concerts were over, we had a chance to interact with the attendees on their way out and I've never felt like more of a celebrity in my life. Some kid even wanted my autograph! Most just wanted pictures and hugs and a chance to say how grateful they were that we came to their country to perform such beautiful songs of peace and hope.

**A shout out to several of my close friends who helped me through some emotionally difficult moments. You know who you are and I'm grateful for your love and support.

**Was proud of my roommate, Willy, who did a fantastic job with his solo in singing "Spirit of God". I could never do something like that in front of hundreds of thousands of people. But he did it with confidence and called the experience "fun!" 

**Was thankful for my Pico de Loro beach excursion people. We had one day to just relax--and whether it was on the boat, snorkeling, just laying in a bungalo on the sand or swimming in the water, it was very nice.

**The youth, who put on a cultural celebration just for the Choir, were incredible. Months and months of hard work and practice really made their performance memorable. It was what was in their eyes and overall countenance, though, that was really impactful. They know who they are and they love freely.

**Lastly, I just want to express my appreciation for all those who made the tour happen. Such an undertaking! So many hours of behind-the-scenes work. The unsung heroes.

Here are a few pics. 

Until next time, may God be with you.

Arrived at the airport (3:30 am)

Jeremy, Patrick, Wes, Andy, Willy

Some Filipino youth after their cultural celebration

One of the youth sporting his cultural costume

Walk on the boardwalk: Matt, Wes, me, Jason

Sporting our barong: Jason, me, Wes, Andrew

Off to Pico de Loro beach!

A "distinguished" selfie of me and Wes at the beach

The beach boat crew

Chillin after the beach: Patrick, me

My roommate Willy with his bedtime treat

After the concert, greeting guests