TCATS #386 - To the Depths of Patience

As much of the United States, and more particularly Utah, gets back to living life that almost reflects pre-pandemic times, the members of the Tabernacle Choir are finding out just how much patience they're made of! Friday's newsletter, yet again, contained no information on when we'll be back singing again. And people are going CRAZY. Several choir members took to Facebook to vent just a little steam.  And I've been getting texts from others who are also trying really hard to be patient but are finding it terribly difficult. It's one thing to be patient when you have an explanation. It's entirely another thing when there seemingly isn't any. 

Some quotes from our FB group and from texts:

"Major disappointment"
"Not this week, dang it!"
"It's like Groundhog Day, again and again and again..."
"I'm hanging on with faith and courage"
"I think it will be July or August"
"August/September"
" I just want information! It doesn’t even have to be crazy soon just at least a date or a plan or something!"
"Maybe they originally thought we'd still have restrictions in place this summer so they didn't plan for us coming back so soon"
"I've been so disappointed they haven't been more transparent with 'the plan'"
"What, exactly, are we waiting for?"

The Church has adopted this very calculated, careful, and cautious approach to everything-pandemic.
And apparently they are determined to keep that approach.

Anyway, I think it only fitting at this point to end this week's blog post with three of my favorite quotes on the subject of PATIENCE. These come from the master of words, insight, and meaning... None other than Neal A. Maxwell:

1) “Patience is a willingness, in a sense, to watch the unfolding purposes of God with a sense of wonder and awe, rather than pacing up and down within the cell of our circumstance.”

2) "When we are unduly impatient, we are suggesting that we know what is best—better than does God. Or, at least, we are asserting that our timetable is better than His. We can grow in faith only if we are willing to wait patiently for God's purposes and patterns to unfold in our lives, on His timetable.”

3) "Patience helps us to use, rather than protest, these seeming flat periods of life, becoming filled with quiet wonder over the past and with anticipation for that which may lie ahead, instead of demeaning the particular flatness through which we may be passing at the time.  We should savor even the seemingly ordinary times...".

 

(Read his talk on the subject, here)

Until next time, God be with you,

 

 

TCATS #385 - Bread

I consider myself a pretty good cook. I started at a young age learning how to make simple dishes and desserts. Especially desserts. For some reason my younger brothers and I would spend hours each Sunday making tapioca pudding, brownies, No-Bake cookies, and orange julius slushes. As I grew older, I started making various lunches and dinners for the family which transferred over into my college life and later into my married life. Nowadays, with my wife fully into her Masters degree homework, I'm usually on dinner duty. And although my cooking doesn't involve a lot of variety, my family usually DOES like what I make for them, so I'll take that as a win. 

Tonight for dinner, I decided to add the one thing that I've only attempted making once: french bread. My wife is practically famous for her bread dishes (dinner rolls, Swedish Bread, and cinnamon rolls are her specialty), so this time I decided that it would be a very good idea for her to give me some of the "tricks of the trade" as they say. As I followed what she told me to do, everything turned out near-perfect, and I re-learned a few important cooking lessons: first, if you need help, ask for it. Second, learn from the best. And third, it's best to follow instructions with exactness.

These three baking lessons easily transfer over to being a member of the Tabernacle Choir. 

There have been countless times I've turned to my fellow bass brethren and asked for help on how to get a certain rhythm, how to find the right pitch, or how to interpret a particular lyric. I've even asked for help on getting through a recording session or repeating various instructions from our conductors (that I had missed the first time). 

Thankfully learning from the best has never been an issue. Mack Wilberg and Ryan Murphy ARE two of the best conductors IMO. I've felt that and I've witnessed that more times than I can say. I'm very grateful for their continued guidance and devotion to this musical opportunity.

Following instructions with exactness is so critical in the Choir. We never have a lot of time to spare and Mack in particular is well-known for wanting to utilize every second--which we usually do! If we are quick to follow with precision, not only will we sound better overall, but we'll be able to get through all of the music we're asked to sing (and sometime memorize) each week. 

I may never be as good at making bread as my wife, but I sure appreciate the lessons I learned today. And I'm grateful they are lessons that have served me well in Choir and in other parts of my life. 

May they be of value to you, too.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #384 - Turning

There's a scripture in the Book of Mormon, from the book of Alma, that says: "But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility."

This covid "war" has taken its toll on everyone. There have been so many ways it's affected our behavior, thoughts, perspective, patience, and interactions. And now, at least for those in the United States, as masks are coming off and people rediscover the joy of not social distancing, we find ourselves either hardened or softened from what's transpired these past 14 months. Perhaps it's a combination, right? Perhaps we've become more hardened towards our politicians, for example, but more softened in our relationships. Or maybe we're more hardened towards various establishments or policy makers while at the same time more softened in our religious beliefs. Each person's hard/soft ratio is unique to themselves and each represents feelings and emotions and understandings that we can easily or not so easily relate to.

I'm afraid this week I found myself in the "hardened" camp. 

Despite the CDC's declaration that "fully vaccinated people can resume activities without wearing a mask or physically distancing," our local Church congregations continue to adhere to the statement that masks are highly recommended. And when the Choir newsletter came out on Friday, I (and several other Choir members I knew) was very much expecting something to be said about the plan to get back to singing. I would have even taken a short sentence that said something like "Given the CDC's recent adjustment to covid-related mandates, we are working with Church leaders to determine the best time to resume normal Choir operations."

But there was nothing. 

Absolutely nothing.

I was so mad.

I can tell you a little bit about what the hardening process does to a person. I've become more bitter, more resentful, less thankful, more judgmental, less friendly, and more narrowly focused. And while I've certainly not enjoyed any part of this process, I find myself wondering just how it's going to last and how I'm going to reverse it. The only thing I do know about the softening process is that I can't do it alone and that God's grace will be the key. 

So I'm off to search for the key--which actually isn't lost. It's just hard to grasp right now. Hard to hold on to. Hard to turn. Part of me resists that turning, but the words to a Choir song lovingly haunts me: 

Turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come 'round right.

 

Until next time, may God be with you.

TCATS #383 - Respecting Differences

As the United States and various individual states start dropping pandemic-related mandates, I've realized it's going to take a lot of respect and understanding to genuinely interact with those around me. God has commanded us to love one another and while I think everyone can appreciate that commandment and generally agree with it in theory, it's not so easy to implement. And I'm not just talking about having indifference towards others. I'm talking about truly loving them and respecting them, despite what they do or what they say.

The Church leaders within my particular area sent out a memo last Sunday saying that masks were still strongly encouraged, but that none would be turned away if they chose not to wear one to Church services. My wife and I talked at length about what this statement had the potential to do within our local congregation. Would a group of people mandated to be unified suddenly be divided? Would judgment pass to those choosing not to wear a mask? And would they be viewed as less willing to follow counsel and/or less concerned about others' feelings of safety?

I fully admit that I've passed judgement the other way around. Because I believe a plethora of scientific studies that conclude that masks are an ineffective way to prevent covid transmission (particularly the types of masks being worn by the general public), I have a very hard time seeing people actively choosing to wear masks -- especially when they are finally given the long-awaited opportunity not to wear them. As I walked into my church service today and observed others coming in, I was hoping there'd be more people like me (choosing not to wear a mask). While this did not happen (there were only about 12 of us), there was a big struggle going on in my head as I tried soooo hard to have genuine respect and love for those choosing to wear a mask. I don't know how well I succeeded, but at least I was trying.

As I thought about how this all relates to Choir, it re-occurred to me how diverse the people making up the Choir really are. We have men and women with a very wide variety of careers. We have those who have a lot of musical background and some who have very little. We have introverts, extroverts, and personalities that are funny, serious, studious, and easy-going. We have those who identify as straight and those who identify as gay. And we have those who are single, who are married, and who are divorced. 

The beauty of singing with such a diverse group of people though is that all of the differences actually enhance the unification goal we have. Because it's not easy, we have to work at it. And when you work hard at something, the payoff can be beautiful and incredible. 

I guess the take-home message for me is that I need to keep working hard to respect those who believe differently than I do on this whole "time to ditch the mask" thing. Their beliefs in the power of wearing them are probably just as strong as my beliefs in not wearing them. And that's OK. The most important thing is to remember they are my brother or sister and my Christian beliefs demand that I love and respect them. 

I'm embarrassed it's so hard for me. And like Nephi in the scriptures, I'm sad that the sin of judgment "doth so easily beset me." But I'm determined to keep trying. And that's gotta count for something.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #382 - The Friendship Connection

Two experiences in particular this week reminded me of the importance of friendship and connection. 

The first happened on Thursday as I met with a few friends from Choir, for lunch. As we all sat around the table looking at each other and hearing about various changes and experiences each of us had gone through over the past little while, it was clear we weren't the same individuals that we were a year ago. But the one thing that hadn't changed was our love and friendship for each other--which, if anything, had been magnified and adjusted in many good ways. 

The second happened on Saturday evening. One of my daughter's friends, Brandon, had (in conjunction with his parents) invited his closest friends and their parents to an informal dinner to celebrate connection and friendship. The background to that event was this: Senior year in high school is a difficult one. It's fun and everything, but the realization that all too soon everyone is going to launch out into the world in their own direction and on their own path causes some tender emotions to surface. Anyway, near the end of the dinner, Brandon's dad stood up and thanked everyone for coming and thanked them for all they had done to contribute to the important spirit of friendship. He then held up a box filled with neck ties (for Brandon's guy friends) and necklaces (for the girls) and challenged them to wear these each first Sunday of the month so that no matter where they were in the world, at least they'd know that they were all wearing these symbols of unity and friendship at the same time--and THAT would help keep the memories alive and the connection going. 

I thought that was a pretty cool thing to do. And I could tell that he, himself, had really treasured the friends he had made in high school. 

Friendship and connection within the context of being a member of the Tabernacle Choir is a very important part of the overall experience. And it's one that is at the center of being able to fulfill the Choir's mission. As we rely on each other, prepare together, and exhibit kindness and respect towards each other, we can sing with unity and successfully project the love and peace of Christ to those listening. 

Changing topics entirely, I did want to mention that the State of Utah finally lifted the mask mandate for larger groups over 50. So, that's definitely one hurdle that was in the way of singing again that's no longer a hurdle. I suppose the judgment call on when we CAN get back together again now falls squarely on the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I would expect that their abundantly cautious approach with all things pandemic will continue to prevail in the short-term. But I hope and pray that they won't take too long. It's time to move forward, IMO.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

[Pictured below: my best friends from high school. . .]

TCATS #381 - Sometimes You DO Catch a Break

My wife has been working on a Master's degree and as her first class came to a close this past week, she had a final to take. This was, understandably, a big deal and the whole family prayed that good results would be the outcome. Part me was half-expecting it to not go well. Not because my wife hadn't studied hard (she had), or not because she hadn't put in the time to learn the material well (because she had), and not because she hadn't sacrificed family time and sleep (because she had). But because for some reason, God didn't want it to happen--He had some higher reason or lesson to teach that would only come from failure. In this instance however, after she had finished taking the test, she got the results about 1/2 hr later and was told that she had passed.

Woohoo!

I found myself thinking the same thing about another experience that happened this week. My daughter was hoping to get into a better on-campus dorm for her first semester this coming Fall. She was told that housin changes could be made at 9:00 AM this morning. So she and I both got on the computer and right at 9 we logged in successfully. As Lydia was looking for the hall and room she wanted, she was suddenly kicked out with the message that the server had reached capacity and to try again later. So close and so frustrating! We sat there and refreshed the page over and over again for about ten minutes and while I still had hope, a part of me thought that God's will in all of this could lead to an outcome we weren't hoping for. I started thinking about how to console my daughter and give her the all-too familiar "speech" about how God does things for various reasons and that this was meant to happen and that things would work out somehow. But in mid-thought, I refreshed the page and was suddenly let back in. Lydia found the room and clicked on Submit and then it was done. 

Double woohoo!

Now I realize that God's ways are often not our ways and His plan is perfect and all of the experiences we receive are ultimately for our good. Intellectually I know those things. But because I know them, I've come to expect that my will almost never equates to God's will and too often expect "the worst" (which, ironically, it actually "the best"). 

Anyway, the purpose of this post is not to delve into the mysteries of God's will. But rather to illustrate that sometimes things that you really, really want to have happen, actually do happen. Some times we actually do "catch a break" as they say.

Being in the Tabernacle Choir is demanding. And I've talked about most of those demands in this blog throughout the years. Mack and Ryan really don't waste even a second during rehearsals. Memorizing music is time consuming. Waking up early Sunday mornings is sometimes hard. Recording sessions are grueling. And sometimes for the basses, singing in-tune is nearly impossible to do. But every so often we catch a break. Mack or Ryan will let us out early. Or one week we won't have any music to memorize. Or the seating manager puts me right next to one of my best choir friends. Or I get to sing not three of my favorites pieces for the upcoming Music & Spoken Word, but all five! And in those rare moments, the basses might even hear the heavenly words "You sound good basses!"

God probably gives us a break much more than we realize or recognize. My hope is that we can have eyes to see them and be thankful for them. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #380 - All In

There were several times this week in which my kids engaged me in various conversations. Most of these happened later at night when the day was near done and I was really tired. For some of these conversations, I was able to pull myself out of my fatigue-induced cloudy indifference and be a true participant. For some though, the conversations were one-sided as I half listened and piped up only occasionally with a lame "uh-huh" or "yeah" or "oh, interesting". I always feel bad about those experiences because I feel like I failed at one of my primary responsibilities and opportunities--being "all in" when my kids are wanting to share and engage and truly be heard. 

Being all in is certainly not limited to parents listening to kids. It's an important concept for all of us to master, regardless of the activity we're engaged in. I suspect that each of us could identify at least one thing over the past month that we only gave a partial effort to. And while we are not perfect and certainly have limitations, being all in is a goal worthy of our striving efforts to obtain.

There is some very deep irony in the fact that months before the pandemic hit, I was not all in when it came to the Tabernacle Choir. I was taking it for granted, getting a little impatient with how rehearsals were going, and oft times looked at my watch more than once just eager for it to be over. 

Do you think I wish that I would have been all in for those months leading up to the Choir being shut down?

Absolutely.

This long pause, though, has brought a perspective change. And it's one that I'm determined to keep. While I can't promise that I'll be all in, all of the time, I'm going to do my best. Not just for me, but for the overall mission of the Choir. Don't you think that people watching or listening to the Choir will be more uplifted and encourage and inspired if the choir members themselves are all in? I sure think so. Working hard, memorizing the music, humbly rehearsing, showing enthusiasm, striving to be more like Christ, and feeling love towards our fellow brothers and sisters is what being "all in" looks like to me. And as soon as this pause is over, that's what I'm going to try and do.

Until next time, God be with you.