TCATS #384 - Turning

There's a scripture in the Book of Mormon, from the book of Alma, that says: "But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility."

This covid "war" has taken its toll on everyone. There have been so many ways it's affected our behavior, thoughts, perspective, patience, and interactions. And now, at least for those in the United States, as masks are coming off and people rediscover the joy of not social distancing, we find ourselves either hardened or softened from what's transpired these past 14 months. Perhaps it's a combination, right? Perhaps we've become more hardened towards our politicians, for example, but more softened in our relationships. Or maybe we're more hardened towards various establishments or policy makers while at the same time more softened in our religious beliefs. Each person's hard/soft ratio is unique to themselves and each represents feelings and emotions and understandings that we can easily or not so easily relate to.

I'm afraid this week I found myself in the "hardened" camp. 

Despite the CDC's declaration that "fully vaccinated people can resume activities without wearing a mask or physically distancing," our local Church congregations continue to adhere to the statement that masks are highly recommended. And when the Choir newsletter came out on Friday, I (and several other Choir members I knew) was very much expecting something to be said about the plan to get back to singing. I would have even taken a short sentence that said something like "Given the CDC's recent adjustment to covid-related mandates, we are working with Church leaders to determine the best time to resume normal Choir operations."

But there was nothing. 

Absolutely nothing.

I was so mad.

I can tell you a little bit about what the hardening process does to a person. I've become more bitter, more resentful, less thankful, more judgmental, less friendly, and more narrowly focused. And while I've certainly not enjoyed any part of this process, I find myself wondering just how it's going to last and how I'm going to reverse it. The only thing I do know about the softening process is that I can't do it alone and that God's grace will be the key. 

So I'm off to search for the key--which actually isn't lost. It's just hard to grasp right now. Hard to hold on to. Hard to turn. Part of me resists that turning, but the words to a Choir song lovingly haunts me: 

Turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come 'round right.

 

Until next time, may God be with you.

TCATS #383 - Respecting Differences

As the United States and various individual states start dropping pandemic-related mandates, I've realized it's going to take a lot of respect and understanding to genuinely interact with those around me. God has commanded us to love one another and while I think everyone can appreciate that commandment and generally agree with it in theory, it's not so easy to implement. And I'm not just talking about having indifference towards others. I'm talking about truly loving them and respecting them, despite what they do or what they say.

The Church leaders within my particular area sent out a memo last Sunday saying that masks were still strongly encouraged, but that none would be turned away if they chose not to wear one to Church services. My wife and I talked at length about what this statement had the potential to do within our local congregation. Would a group of people mandated to be unified suddenly be divided? Would judgment pass to those choosing not to wear a mask? And would they be viewed as less willing to follow counsel and/or less concerned about others' feelings of safety?

I fully admit that I've passed judgement the other way around. Because I believe a plethora of scientific studies that conclude that masks are an ineffective way to prevent covid transmission (particularly the types of masks being worn by the general public), I have a very hard time seeing people actively choosing to wear masks -- especially when they are finally given the long-awaited opportunity not to wear them. As I walked into my church service today and observed others coming in, I was hoping there'd be more people like me (choosing not to wear a mask). While this did not happen (there were only about 12 of us), there was a big struggle going on in my head as I tried soooo hard to have genuine respect and love for those choosing to wear a mask. I don't know how well I succeeded, but at least I was trying.

As I thought about how this all relates to Choir, it re-occurred to me how diverse the people making up the Choir really are. We have men and women with a very wide variety of careers. We have those who have a lot of musical background and some who have very little. We have introverts, extroverts, and personalities that are funny, serious, studious, and easy-going. We have those who identify as straight and those who identify as gay. And we have those who are single, who are married, and who are divorced. 

The beauty of singing with such a diverse group of people though is that all of the differences actually enhance the unification goal we have. Because it's not easy, we have to work at it. And when you work hard at something, the payoff can be beautiful and incredible. 

I guess the take-home message for me is that I need to keep working hard to respect those who believe differently than I do on this whole "time to ditch the mask" thing. Their beliefs in the power of wearing them are probably just as strong as my beliefs in not wearing them. And that's OK. The most important thing is to remember they are my brother or sister and my Christian beliefs demand that I love and respect them. 

I'm embarrassed it's so hard for me. And like Nephi in the scriptures, I'm sad that the sin of judgment "doth so easily beset me." But I'm determined to keep trying. And that's gotta count for something.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #382 - The Friendship Connection

Two experiences in particular this week reminded me of the importance of friendship and connection. 

The first happened on Thursday as I met with a few friends from Choir, for lunch. As we all sat around the table looking at each other and hearing about various changes and experiences each of us had gone through over the past little while, it was clear we weren't the same individuals that we were a year ago. But the one thing that hadn't changed was our love and friendship for each other--which, if anything, had been magnified and adjusted in many good ways. 

The second happened on Saturday evening. One of my daughter's friends, Brandon, had (in conjunction with his parents) invited his closest friends and their parents to an informal dinner to celebrate connection and friendship. The background to that event was this: Senior year in high school is a difficult one. It's fun and everything, but the realization that all too soon everyone is going to launch out into the world in their own direction and on their own path causes some tender emotions to surface. Anyway, near the end of the dinner, Brandon's dad stood up and thanked everyone for coming and thanked them for all they had done to contribute to the important spirit of friendship. He then held up a box filled with neck ties (for Brandon's guy friends) and necklaces (for the girls) and challenged them to wear these each first Sunday of the month so that no matter where they were in the world, at least they'd know that they were all wearing these symbols of unity and friendship at the same time--and THAT would help keep the memories alive and the connection going. 

I thought that was a pretty cool thing to do. And I could tell that he, himself, had really treasured the friends he had made in high school. 

Friendship and connection within the context of being a member of the Tabernacle Choir is a very important part of the overall experience. And it's one that is at the center of being able to fulfill the Choir's mission. As we rely on each other, prepare together, and exhibit kindness and respect towards each other, we can sing with unity and successfully project the love and peace of Christ to those listening. 

Changing topics entirely, I did want to mention that the State of Utah finally lifted the mask mandate for larger groups over 50. So, that's definitely one hurdle that was in the way of singing again that's no longer a hurdle. I suppose the judgment call on when we CAN get back together again now falls squarely on the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I would expect that their abundantly cautious approach with all things pandemic will continue to prevail in the short-term. But I hope and pray that they won't take too long. It's time to move forward, IMO.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

[Pictured below: my best friends from high school. . .]

TCATS #381 - Sometimes You DO Catch a Break

My wife has been working on a Master's degree and as her first class came to a close this past week, she had a final to take. This was, understandably, a big deal and the whole family prayed that good results would be the outcome. Part me was half-expecting it to not go well. Not because my wife hadn't studied hard (she had), or not because she hadn't put in the time to learn the material well (because she had), and not because she hadn't sacrificed family time and sleep (because she had). But because for some reason, God didn't want it to happen--He had some higher reason or lesson to teach that would only come from failure. In this instance however, after she had finished taking the test, she got the results about 1/2 hr later and was told that she had passed.

Woohoo!

I found myself thinking the same thing about another experience that happened this week. My daughter was hoping to get into a better on-campus dorm for her first semester this coming Fall. She was told that housin changes could be made at 9:00 AM this morning. So she and I both got on the computer and right at 9 we logged in successfully. As Lydia was looking for the hall and room she wanted, she was suddenly kicked out with the message that the server had reached capacity and to try again later. So close and so frustrating! We sat there and refreshed the page over and over again for about ten minutes and while I still had hope, a part of me thought that God's will in all of this could lead to an outcome we weren't hoping for. I started thinking about how to console my daughter and give her the all-too familiar "speech" about how God does things for various reasons and that this was meant to happen and that things would work out somehow. But in mid-thought, I refreshed the page and was suddenly let back in. Lydia found the room and clicked on Submit and then it was done. 

Double woohoo!

Now I realize that God's ways are often not our ways and His plan is perfect and all of the experiences we receive are ultimately for our good. Intellectually I know those things. But because I know them, I've come to expect that my will almost never equates to God's will and too often expect "the worst" (which, ironically, it actually "the best"). 

Anyway, the purpose of this post is not to delve into the mysteries of God's will. But rather to illustrate that sometimes things that you really, really want to have happen, actually do happen. Some times we actually do "catch a break" as they say.

Being in the Tabernacle Choir is demanding. And I've talked about most of those demands in this blog throughout the years. Mack and Ryan really don't waste even a second during rehearsals. Memorizing music is time consuming. Waking up early Sunday mornings is sometimes hard. Recording sessions are grueling. And sometimes for the basses, singing in-tune is nearly impossible to do. But every so often we catch a break. Mack or Ryan will let us out early. Or one week we won't have any music to memorize. Or the seating manager puts me right next to one of my best choir friends. Or I get to sing not three of my favorites pieces for the upcoming Music & Spoken Word, but all five! And in those rare moments, the basses might even hear the heavenly words "You sound good basses!"

God probably gives us a break much more than we realize or recognize. My hope is that we can have eyes to see them and be thankful for them. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #380 - All In

There were several times this week in which my kids engaged me in various conversations. Most of these happened later at night when the day was near done and I was really tired. For some of these conversations, I was able to pull myself out of my fatigue-induced cloudy indifference and be a true participant. For some though, the conversations were one-sided as I half listened and piped up only occasionally with a lame "uh-huh" or "yeah" or "oh, interesting". I always feel bad about those experiences because I feel like I failed at one of my primary responsibilities and opportunities--being "all in" when my kids are wanting to share and engage and truly be heard. 

Being all in is certainly not limited to parents listening to kids. It's an important concept for all of us to master, regardless of the activity we're engaged in. I suspect that each of us could identify at least one thing over the past month that we only gave a partial effort to. And while we are not perfect and certainly have limitations, being all in is a goal worthy of our striving efforts to obtain.

There is some very deep irony in the fact that months before the pandemic hit, I was not all in when it came to the Tabernacle Choir. I was taking it for granted, getting a little impatient with how rehearsals were going, and oft times looked at my watch more than once just eager for it to be over. 

Do you think I wish that I would have been all in for those months leading up to the Choir being shut down?

Absolutely.

This long pause, though, has brought a perspective change. And it's one that I'm determined to keep. While I can't promise that I'll be all in, all of the time, I'm going to do my best. Not just for me, but for the overall mission of the Choir. Don't you think that people watching or listening to the Choir will be more uplifted and encourage and inspired if the choir members themselves are all in? I sure think so. Working hard, memorizing the music, humbly rehearsing, showing enthusiasm, striving to be more like Christ, and feeling love towards our fellow brothers and sisters is what being "all in" looks like to me. And as soon as this pause is over, that's what I'm going to try and do.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #379 - When it Rains, it Pours

There have been a lot of, shall we say, temporal challenges lately in the Pitt home. None of them have been huge challenges, but the compilation of small to medium ones starts to make them feel like something big. 

Here is a smattering of them...

*About six weeks ago, I was in such a hurry to back out of the garage that I actually backed right into the garage door as it hadn't retracted all the way up yet. A stupid but costly mistake, and one that resulted in the garage door panel taking six weeks to get replaced and installed. 

*Centerville has been one of the cities along the Wasatch Front that has suffered from several wind storms lately. One last Fall and then two in the past few months. We lucked out in that there was no severe damage to our home, but there were some shingles that blew off our roof and we just didn't get around to replacing them. Fast forward to this week when we had not only another windstorm but a lot of rain as well. The next day, my wife discovered water dripping off the chandelier in the master bedroom--and we realized too late that we should have had a repair guy come out long before.

*Our washing machine the past month or two has started to sound awful during the spin cycle. It's now to the point that every time we do a load, we fear that whatever is about to break will actually break--which makes washing more unenjoyable than it already is. 

*My daughter called the other day just as I was about to get on a conference call at work and said that our Mazda had a flat tire and she needed some help knowing what to do. I drove down in the other car and we worked together to get the spare on and get it over to the tire shop to get it repaired. I had anticipated this happening because when I had taken it in to get serviced a few months ago, they had found a staple in the tire (lodged tightly and not causing any harm--at the moment).

When I think about all of these things along with several others, one of the themes that becomes evident is procrastination. We're all guilty of this to one degree or another but each of these incidents cited above could have been avoided if I had done things a little sooner. If I hadn't procrastinated doing some things last-minute, I wouldn't have been in such a hurry to get out of the garage. If we had called a roofer guy months ago, we wouldn't have had incurred the water damage. If I had gotten the tire looked at earlier, a flat tire wouldn't have become a reality at (and at an inconvenient time). And let's just hope that it's not too late to call the appliance repair place so they can salvage our washer!

In choir, procrastination can lead to increased stress and embarrassment. Typically we're given weeks to memorize songs that will be on our broadcasts, or the concerts we perform, or on General Conference. It's very easy to put off memorizing, but if you put it off too long, you put yourself into a stressful situation the day or two before the performance. And worse yet, sometimes you discover that despite your best efforts, you just can't quite get the words of the songs into your head. So then you go into the performance feeling unprepared, relying way too much on the guys around you, and setting yourself up for a possible camera close-up right at the very time you fail to get the words right!

The scripture (D&C 38:30) about "if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear" is a very wise scripture to hearken to. It's my hope that we can all do a little better at avoiding procrastination so that we will be much less likely to say "when it rains, it pours."

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #378 - Bitter Sweet Symphony

I'm back. 

Thanks for the break. I needed to gather my thoughts and figure out what would be best to write about going forward--until such time as the Tabernacle Choir actually meets again. And then once we do meet again, I'll continue relaying personal thoughts, observations, and insights about my journey with the Choir.

For now, I thought I could just talk about lessons I learn every week from my every day life. And then comment on how those lessons can relate to my past experiences with the Choir.

So let's get started with lesson #1.

Recently I took a new position at my place of employment. It's been a rather big change because I'm doing something I've never really done before. Sure, there are skills I've learned in years past that are helping me make this transition, but overall, it's new and has been filled with levels of stress I haven't felt in quite some time. 

One of the aspects of this new job is being on-call 24/7 for one week out of every three. My first on-call week was last week and I was a bundle of nerves. Even though it doesn't happen that often, there's always a chance I'll get a text from a pager service and have 15 minutes to reply to it. After replying, I have to kick into high gear to understand the problem, find the right resources to address the problem, and assure the customer that appropriate attention is being given to resolve the problem. 

The first night of being on-call was a very sleep-LESS experience.  Although I had tested my phone twice to make sure my ringer was sufficiently loud enough to wake me up, I still kept waking up about every hour to make sure I hadn't missed anything. Subsequent nights got better and thankfully my mind is now learning to shut off at night even though it has to simultaneously anticipate being jump-started with a sudden page.

Amidst all of the stress and trying to acclimate to being on-call and efficiently responding to "normal" customer escalations throughout the day, I quite unexpectedly discovered a new perspective on the law of opposites. 

One scripture in the Doctrine & Covenants says "for if they never should have bitter they could not know the sweet." How true I found that to be! As I ended my on-call duties this past Tuesday and handed that particular responsibility over to the next guy, I suddenly treasured my nights so much more than I had before! Going places without my laptop, enjoying moments without listening to my phone, running errands knowing I wouldn't get interrupted, spending time with family... These were all sweet feelings and ones that I would have taken for granted had I not experienced the "bitter" on-call reality.

One way this bitter-sweet lesson relates to my choir experience is thinking about the occasional recording process we sometimes engage in. I've mentioned that process several times on my blog, but man! It's a grueling one. It can literally take up to 2+ hours just to get one song fully recorded. The start-stop-fix-start again process just isn't very fun. But after it's over, regular rehearsals are suddenly much more appreciated. And when the recordings are finally released on CD and Spotify and Apple Music, etc, the bitter recording experience suddenly becomes all worth it. 

While I hesitate to say "Go do something hard!", I can tell you that going through hard things does, at the very least, cause you to appreciate life in a whole new way once that hard thing has passed. And while I'm not yet at the point where I can thank God for the bitter things, I can thank Him for the sweetness that follows. 

Until next time, God be with you.