TCATS #419 - The New People

While the past couple of years have been challenging for seasoned choir members in various ways, it's certainly been rough for the newer members of the choir. You have the "new" choir members that began their journey in January of 2020 whose experience was cut short just three months later. Then you have the new members who joined in January of this year--though technically they didn't start in January because of the additional "pause" the Choir went on until March 3rd. The ones who joined in 2020 got thrown into the learning curve fire as they had all of these pieces to learn for Oct 2021 General Conference, the MSW broadcasts, and the Christmas Concert. And now the 2022 new people have only had a few weeks to learn music for the April General Conference which is only one week away. 

The 2022 people, once Conference is over, will have some additional time to complete Choir School and Chorale and won't have to worry too much (at least for now) about learning so many new pieces week to week. But the 2020 people continue their learning curve which has only been exacerbated by the new goal to memorize almost every piece of music we sing so that the audience has more of an opportunity to look into our eyes.

This is all to say that I have great empathy for them. I've been so consumed internally about things going on in my own choir experience that I sort of forgot about them. But today, as all of the new 2022 people sat off to the side to observe MSW and to participate in the extra rehearsal afterwards, their challenges (along with the 2020 newbies) were ones I thought more about. I also felt a bit ashamed that I haven't been praying for them and their challenges. Which is the least I can do.

As I was walking back to the music lockers after rehearsal today, I overheard a conversation between two of the 2020 newbies. They were talking about how many hours they had rehearsed at home just to prepare for today's MSW broadcast. One of the guys spent over two hours on just one piece alone-- "Their Sound is Gone Out Into All Lands" (by Handel). It all reminded me that yes, I do need to pray more for my choir family. And yes, I need to be more grateful for the fact that usually, I can show up to Choir, sing most of the pieces by heart, and only have to occasionally spend minimal time at home learning our songs.

Some interesting tidbits for the week:

*We had a distinguished guest join us at Thursday night's rehearsal. His name was Dmytro Kushnerukhe and he is one of the Consulate Generals of Ukraine (stationed in San Francisco). As he was announced, all those in the room rose to their feet and gave him quite a warm welcome.

*While we haven't had time to prepare for a traditional live Easter Concert, there's a special streaming Easter Celebration on April 10th at 10:00AM. Details HERE.

*The next choir retirement is coming up in April (to say goodbye to those who were supposed to retire in 2020). And then we'll have another one in the Fall for those who were supposed to retire in 2021.

Have a nice week everyone. And if there's someone that maybe you've forgotten to pray for lately, maybe start praying for them again. :)

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #418 - High Praise #2 + Just Plain Weird

It was a pretty good week in Tabernacle Choir land.

And even though Thursday's rehearsal started off with some very triggering/frustrating moments--which didn't set a very great tone for the rest of evening--focusing on the music itself and thinking about why exactly I was there, really helped.

Today's Music & the Spoken Word went very well and for the 2nd time in my Tabernacle Choir career, I heard Mack say at the conclusion of the program, "It couldn't have gone better." Mack has been very happy about our performances lately--particularly with seeing our eyes and faces more now that we've been utilizing the teleprompter and have little need to look down at our music. While there are downsides to the teleprompter which I've already talked about previously, it certainly does allow our countenances to more fully share our testimonies of Christ.

My favorite song of the day was the first one and the last one. The first one was "All Creatures of Our God and King" and it gave me all the feels. I particularly honed in on the lyric "Ye light of evening find a voice." Why that lyric, you ask? Well for me, it's symbolic of those who may not have a really bright light to share, but find a way to share it anyway in meaningful and significant ways.

The last song was a new one called "Lift Up Your Hearts", which was originally arranged by Mack for a specific out-of-state choir. The members of that choir were listening in this morning knowing that that we'd be performing that song. So it was kind of fun to envision them all tuning in. 

We did have a live audience this morning of maybe 100 people or so. Always great to have someone we can actually see as we perform! I think most of us in the Choir were expecting to finally sing our signature closing piece "God Be With You" after the program was over. But then, something just plain weird happened.

With no warning, Mack said "OK, we're now going to sing the happy birthday song to KSL" and then proceeded to quickly sing it for us just so there'd be no question as to how it was supposed to go. So we just launched into singing happy birthday to KSL (a local TV/radio station) right after we had just ended MSW on such a spiritual note. The whole time I was thinking, "So we traded what could have been a very impactful song for the audience for what felt like some commercial?"

It didn't stop there though. 

Following our happy birthday singing, Mack announced we needed to speak the words....oh shoot! I now forget what they were! Something like "Thanks for all you do Mark". That wasn't it, but it was something random like that--for a person we didn't know (at least I didn't). After THAT, the audience started filing out and we continued with our extra rehearsal.

Sometimes the Choir does do weird stuff--and it's been awhile since we have. So I guess we were due.

At any rate, in closing I wanted to mention some nice things people said to me today. Steve, on my left, showed genuine concern and asked how my eye was doing. Later, Jay, on my right, said I have facial expressions while I sing that he thought were great (my wife always says that too--so kudos to her as well). Wes gave me a fist bump and said he was glad to see me today. And Ben and Willy thanked me for driving. 

Sometimes it's the little things that have the biggest impact.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #417 - Back to Normal*

Due to a bad eye infection this past week, I chose not to participate in choir. So I don't have a lot to say about the actual choir experience this time. However, I did want to share a few thoughts I had which aren't too terribly related, but perhaps worth sharing anyway.

The first relates to our renewed efforts to be more intentional missionaries (which is one of the new directives of the Choir). One way I can do that is to promote recent streaming playlists that have been created--which give listeners new opportunities to listen to the music of the Choir with certain themes in mind. The official Choir blog mentioned it awhile back, but I wanted to highlight it myself and point you to the latest playlist created on Spotify called "Meditate with the Tabernacle Choir". You can bring up that playlist by clicking HERE. While I have not gotten into a great habit yet of mediating daily, I do recognize the value of meditation. And this playlist (which promises "calm and relaxing songs") can be one of the tools you can use to achieve your meditation goals. Each month the Choir will create a new themed playlist, so be sure and click on the "Follow" button at the Choir's Spotify home page to be notified of when new playlists and overall new content are published. 

Switching to another topic....

A friend in the choir texted me minutes after the rehearsal started Thursday night to say that we would no longer have to be covid tested each time we came to the Tabernacle to rehearse or perform. So that was happy news. With testing gone and masks gone, I suppose the choir experience is returning to "normal" at long last.

A part of me though wants to cry out "But wait! Does someone want to acknowledge mistakes that were made? The pain that was caused? The emotional turmoil inflicted? How about mentioning the subset of choir/orchestra/bells individuals who still can't be with us to share their light and their testimony because they chose to do what they felt was right in abstaining from vaccination? What about them? While the choir carries on, they continue to hurt and live with a level of frustration that few can relate to. What about the people who felt backed into a corner to get vaxxed/boosted and who are still working to resolve bitter feelings they have? Simply moving on after a 20 second announcement is a very unrealistic thing to expect of them. Yes, is there a need to take up the cross and secure our hands firmly on the tether of forgiveness? Absolutely. Being a Christian demands that of us. But it's not easy.  It takes time. It takes faith. And a lot of prayer."

I get it. Most people (and choir members) are ready to leave the pandemic far behind them. And while I really don't want to talk about it anymore myself and instead focus on helping heal people throughout the world through music (as we all need healing for one reason or another), I reserve the right to still bring up the topic most people have moved on from in an effort to help me and help others arrive at a place they long to be.

So bear with me, please.

Until next time, God be with you. 

TCATS #416 - An Historic Three

Before expressing some feelings about where I'm at with Choir, I wanted to share three reasons why today's performance was significant.

First, it was almost two years from today since the Tabernacle Choir performed in the actual Tabernacle. And I must say, it was nice to be back in our "home". The Conference Center has its perks, but I'd take the Tabernacle any day. 

Second, it was the first time that Music & the Spoken Word had a shortened introduction. 30 seconds shorter, to be exact. It was funny because a couple of months ago as I was watching an episode of MSW, I actually remember thinking that the intro was a bit long because Lloyd Newell had oodles of time to announce all he needed to announce, with plenty of time left over. Anyway, a good change.

Third, it was announced Thursday night that masks were now OPTIONAL!! And THAT, my friends, was the best music my ears heard all night. I'll refrain from making any comments on the timing of this (which seemed to coincide nicely with the trustworthy CDC reswizling their data points and measuring methods--all suspiciously right before the State of the Union address... But wait, I digress!) Walking into Choir this morning without a mask and seeing everyone's faces was a treat.

Oh, and I suppose there could be a fourth reason why today's performance was significant. After our performance, Mack said "Thank you. It could not have gone any better." 
Let me tell you, there's no higher praise that can come from Mack Wilberg.

As for how I felt today. 

Hmm.

It's always so complicated these days.

I think it will all take some time. For me, unmasking was a significant step in my healing process. So over the course of the next few weeks, I think I'll feel happier to be there and more able to fulfill my calling. Part of me felt guilty today for being there at all. I happened to sit in front of a brother who kept saying (at least five times) "It's so good to be with you brethren." or "This music is absolutely beautiful. It's such an honor to sing it with you." or "Aren't we so blessed to have this opportunity."

Don't get me wrong. I was grateful for his comments. But while I'm trying really hard to feel the same way, I'm not quite there yet.

There was a moment during the rehearsal that I actually felt that comforting "tingly" feeling that I sometimes get when the Spirit is testifying of something true. It didn't last long. I was hoping to hold on to it for longer, but just as soon as it came, it was gone. 

I felt gratitude when my friend Ryan offered to help me with my music library duties. He's a good friend and I appreciated his help today since my normal library partner was out.

I don't know...I still feel some measure of sadness, of resentment, and confusion about a lot of different things. But perhaps time and prayer will help that.

At any rate, if you tuned in to watch/listen to today's performance, thank you. And a special shout out to both my new friend in Ohio (who left some very helpful comments last week) and to my wife--who continues to support and encourage and give me space as I navigate the complexities of this Choir experience.

Until next time, God be with you.