TCATS #378 - Bitter Sweet Symphony

I'm back. 

Thanks for the break. I needed to gather my thoughts and figure out what would be best to write about going forward--until such time as the Tabernacle Choir actually meets again. And then once we do meet again, I'll continue relaying personal thoughts, observations, and insights about my journey with the Choir.

For now, I thought I could just talk about lessons I learn every week from my every day life. And then comment on how those lessons can relate to my past experiences with the Choir.

So let's get started with lesson #1.

Recently I took a new position at my place of employment. It's been a rather big change because I'm doing something I've never really done before. Sure, there are skills I've learned in years past that are helping me make this transition, but overall, it's new and has been filled with levels of stress I haven't felt in quite some time. 

One of the aspects of this new job is being on-call 24/7 for one week out of every three. My first on-call week was last week and I was a bundle of nerves. Even though it doesn't happen that often, there's always a chance I'll get a text from a pager service and have 15 minutes to reply to it. After replying, I have to kick into high gear to understand the problem, find the right resources to address the problem, and assure the customer that appropriate attention is being given to resolve the problem. 

The first night of being on-call was a very sleep-LESS experience.  Although I had tested my phone twice to make sure my ringer was sufficiently loud enough to wake me up, I still kept waking up about every hour to make sure I hadn't missed anything. Subsequent nights got better and thankfully my mind is now learning to shut off at night even though it has to simultaneously anticipate being jump-started with a sudden page.

Amidst all of the stress and trying to acclimate to being on-call and efficiently responding to "normal" customer escalations throughout the day, I quite unexpectedly discovered a new perspective on the law of opposites. 

One scripture in the Doctrine & Covenants says "for if they never should have bitter they could not know the sweet." How true I found that to be! As I ended my on-call duties this past Tuesday and handed that particular responsibility over to the next guy, I suddenly treasured my nights so much more than I had before! Going places without my laptop, enjoying moments without listening to my phone, running errands knowing I wouldn't get interrupted, spending time with family... These were all sweet feelings and ones that I would have taken for granted had I not experienced the "bitter" on-call reality.

One way this bitter-sweet lesson relates to my choir experience is thinking about the occasional recording process we sometimes engage in. I've mentioned that process several times on my blog, but man! It's a grueling one. It can literally take up to 2+ hours just to get one song fully recorded. The start-stop-fix-start again process just isn't very fun. But after it's over, regular rehearsals are suddenly much more appreciated. And when the recordings are finally released on CD and Spotify and Apple Music, etc, the bitter recording experience suddenly becomes all worth it. 

While I hesitate to say "Go do something hard!", I can tell you that going through hard things does, at the very least, cause you to appreciate life in a whole new way once that hard thing has passed. And while I'm not yet at the point where I can thank God for the bitter things, I can thank Him for the sweetness that follows. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #377 - Temporary Break

I think I'm going to take a small break from blogging about the Tabernacle Choir. 

Just for a few weeks.

I need to work on receiving some inspiration on exactly what to write about. 

As the choir has been on its hiatus for the past year, I've written about how hard it's been personally, about speculation on when we'll go back, about the Choir organization's accomplishments without the actual members of the Choir, and even about blessings that have come while not being able to sing with the Choir.  And I haven't regretted any post that I've posted. That said, I've reached a place where I feel like rehashing or putting a new spin on any of those topics really isn't what I need to focus on or what you need to keep reading about.

So, out of the 10+ ways the Japanese people say goodbye to each other, I'll say to you "Ja, ne!"  (which means "See you later!")

Though actually, what I should really say is "Itte kimasu" (which literally means "I'll go and come back"). Because come back I will, very soon.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #376 - Six Month Accomplishment Recap

Our weekly newsletter contained a rather nice summary of what the Choir organization has accomplished during the past six months and I thought I'd share that list with you. It's always a little strange reading through these accomplishments knowing that they all happened without any active participation of Choir members themselves. But it's great that the mission of the Choir continues to roll forth, and as mentioned many times before, we're excited to get back together at some point this year and make music again. The first Music & the Spoken Word when we return will be quite the broadcast and I know the "powers that be" are already working on making that a uniquely special event. 

At any rate, here's a fun list of accomplishments to look through. 

*The 110th anniversary of the first recording of the Choir (the second choir in the world and the first in the United States to be recorded at the time).
*The broadcast of Choir's 2019 Christmas concert (aired in December 2020 and was more well-received and viewed than ever before).
*The release of two new Christmas videos (“Baby of Bethlehem” and “The First Noel”).
*The creation and filming of a two-hour Christmas special to be broadcast on PBS and
BYUtv in December 2021.
*The announcement of the twice-postponed 2022 summer tour.
*A content refresh of the Choir's mobile app.
*The continued success of the Piping Up! organ recitals (now nearing 21⁄2 million
views).
*The restreaming of the Choir's 2018 Messiah performance (this coming weekend!).
*The completion of a translation project in which Music & the Spoken Word is now available in 12 languages and two accents (eight of those languages were made available in the past six months--Swedish, Danish, Finnish and Norwegian, Italian, German, Hungarian, Romanian).

Regarding The Messiah restreaming performance this weekend, if you're not up for watching the whole thing, you're invited to (re)watch the Virtual Hallelujah Chorus recording that was done a few years back. It's one of my favorite productions the Choir put together.

To end this post, each week I try to examine how I'm personally feeling about the Choir and this interim period when we're not participating. This week, I don't think I have too many feelings to share, but I will say that when I first read through this list of accomplishments, I had a mix of feeling grateful and feeling upset. That latter emotion just stems from pride and I tried to squalsh it as soon as I felt it. After all, I have every reason to be hopeful and optimistic and thankful. So that's what I'll focus on being.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #375 - One Year

My family is a very music-oriented family and whenever we go on family trips we enjoy listening to a playlist that everyone has contributed to. Without fail, there are always a few songs that get added to the list that everyone sings along to (and not just sings, but belts!). One of those comes from a musical called RENT. I actually haven't seen the musical myself, but the song we all enjoy is called "Seasons of Love". The beginning lyrics go like this:

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes
Five hundred twenty five thousand moments so dear
Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure? Measure a year?
In daylights,
In sunsets,
In midnights,
In cups of coffee,
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife
In five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure a year in a life?

As today marks the one-year mark since the Tabernacle Choir last performed live, I think I could add a few customized lyrics to this song. When the song asks "How do measure? Measure a year?" my response would be

In songs not sung
In rehearsals not attended
In concerts not performed
In friendships unrenewed
In Sunday sleep-ins
In reclaimed Thursday nights
In increased family time
In General Conferences at home

In emotions
In questions
In longings
In speculation
In sadness, in tears, in hope, in faith.
In five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure a year without choir?

As we begin week 53, we know that we will be the caboose on the "return to normal" train. But in the meantime, there are blessings to enjoy and spiritual musical experiences to anticipate. Lessons in patience are never wasted. 

As an aside, I went to the Tabernacle this past week with my friend Ben to return our suits that we used when doing the virtual recording. It was the first time I had been back in a very long time. Hallways were empty and people were scarce. But it was nice to be greeted by our wardrobe guy, Vance, and to visually see that everything was as we had left it. One day, all the people will be back and our musical journey will continue.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #374 - Postponement #2

It came as no surprise this week that the Choir leadership announced we'd not be going on tour this year--a tour that was originally scheduled for 2020 but was then postponed to 2021. What DID come as a surprise was the wording they used. Since tours are usually several years in the planning and scheduling, and since we usually follow the pattern of going on tour every other year--which means there was already a tour scheduled for 2022--I was surprised to hear them say that the 2021 tour was POSTPONED rather than CANCELLED. That would seem to indicate that whatever tour was originally scheduled for 2022 will just be postponed as well.

At any rate, while most choir and orchestra members saw this coming, I know of a few who expressed some sadness and disappointment over the news. Each of us is in a different situation when it comes to going on these tours. For some, their choir days are very numbered which means the more tours that are postponed, the less they'll be able to go on. For others, it's not so much a matter of too few years left, but rather having the "stars align" with their busy work schedules, family plans, and other life events that come up. But, as they say, "it is what it is" and we trust that God will, on an individual level, provide a way if He wants us to go.

You may or may not be interested in this following tidbit, but in the email that choir members received regarding the tour announcement, it was also clarified what's happening to choir members who were supposed to retire in 2020, 2021, and 2022. With covid taking away a whole year+ of choir, there was some question as to whether or not compensation would be granted. And indeed, it looks like there will be some! For those who were supposed to retire in April 2020, they'll be given two more Music & Spoken Word performances with a retirement ceremony to follow shortly thereafter. For those who were set to retire in April 2021, they will get to continue singing with the Choir for a whole other year, plus they'll get to go on the 2022 tour and sing in the 2022 Pioneer Day Concert. For those who are set to retire in April of 2022, they'll be able to go on the 2022 tour and sing in the 2022 Pioneer Day concert as well. Then, both 2021 retirees and 2022 retirees will retire together in August of 2022. 

As for auditions, there's been no announcement that I know of. My guess is that those who began the audition process in 2020 and were selected to continue with those auditions (but didn't get a chance to go through the whole process), will have those auditions resumed in 2021.

To end, I just wanted to express some (what I think is) happy news for those of us in Utah. The legislature recently passed a bill that will lift the mask mandate on April 10th. It will be nice to see people's faces again at the grocery store and at other establishments! However, the bill does not lift the mandate for gatherings over 50 people. I have always said that the Tabernacle Choir will be the LAST group to congregate again without restrictions--given our size. So it remains to be seen when that will actually happen. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #373 - The End in Mind

I've never been a believer in coincidence. Neal A Maxwell once said: "This word [coincidence] is understandable for mortals to use, but coincidence is not an appropriate word to describe the workings of an omniscient God. He does not do things by ‘coincidence’ but … by ‘divine design.’”

Today as I was listening to the "spoken word" as part of Music & the Spoken Word, I had this thought to go back and see what the last spoken word was before the Tabernacle Choir shut down live performances back in March of 2020. I was very curious to see if it would foreshadow the pandemic days ahead or if there was some hint as to what we were all about to experience as everything started shutting down. 

So, I searched the MSW archives and found the entry for March 15, 2020. The title of the message made me smile as I thought about two possible meanings given the state of things. The title was "The End in Mind". 

To be fair, that title's intended meaning was to help people think about what their obituary would say once they had departed this earth. "How do we want to be remembered?", it asks. 

But examining the title through the lens of the pandemic, I thought of two other meanings.

First, when things shut down mid-March across the United States, "the end in mind" seemed to indicate it was the end of life as we knew it. We all started a personal and difficult journey of adjusting to a new and challenging reality. 

Second, and much more positive, is the fact that there are more and more news articles and people talking about "the end"--meaning the end of the pandemic. As people around the world get vaccinated and as the number of cases continues to decline, a very bright light shines upon us as we think about "the end in mind". 

So, even though Lloyd Newell, the host of MSW, didn't know it at the time, the title of his message was indeed a very inspired one. In more ways than he ever intended it to be. 

Ways that perfectly fit into God's grand design.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #372 - Thank You Jerold Ottley

As you may have heard, former Tabernacle Choir director Jerold Ottley passed away this past Friday and those within the Choir community took pause to feel grateful for all that Brother Ottley contributed during his time holding the director's baton (which was nearly 25 years!). 

Although I never knew Bro. Ottley personally or had the opportunity to sing under his direction, I did take some time to learn about him and what, exactly, he contributed to the Tabernacle Choir--aside from directing it for so many years. Most of what I mention here can be found in a write-up the Choir organization published Friday, but the things that impressed me the most were these:

 *responsible for 30 official recordings
*went on 20 tours
*directed 1,300 MSW performances
*put in place the retirement policy, the attendance policy, audition procedures, and the formation of the Choir School
*appointed the first female organist
*established the annual Christmas Concert tradition

As I pondered the significance of all of these things (and there are certainly many more wonderful things about Bro. Ottley not even related to the Choir), It got me thinking of what legacy I'll leave when my earthly life ends. What will people say of me? What will they ultimately remember?  These are sobering questions and ones that pop into my head a little more often these days as I approach my 50th year. When it's all said and done, I suppose what I hope for the most is that people remember that I was kind to them and genuinely loved them--that I lived the second great commandment. As I've been extra critical and judgmental of people lately, I need to do better. And perhaps keeping this end-of-life perspective will help me in my efforts to improve. 

Until next time, God be with you.