TCATS #442 - Conference Oct-22

Another conference has come and gone.

The Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square continued to play its usual role of providing music for Saturday morning and all of the Sunday sessions. We had extra rehearsals for the past several weeks to adequately prepare and also had a Tuesday rehearsal (in addition to our normal Thursday one) this past week, just to make sure we were in tip top shape. 

This conference experience was different for me in several ways, mainly because I only sang on Saturday. That said, I wanted to just share a few brief thoughts/observations about this weekend.

**While I was glad to spend Sunday with my wife and family (which included sleeping in a bit, having a homemade cinnamon roll breakfast, etc), half of my heart was at the Conference Center as I watched my fellow singers do an excellent job delivering their musical message.

**From the feedback I got, Rick Elliott's arrangement of "Let Us All Press On" continues to be a favorite. It was sung right after some stirring words by President Nelson, which I'm sure just added to the performance.

**God often answers the righteous desires of our hearts (though, of course, sometimes He doesn't for whatever reason). A friend of mine was slated not to sing the Sun AM session due to not having as high of an attendance percentage. He was really really sad about it. There were two songs in that session he was looking forward to singing-- and I knew that given his testimony and personal devotion to his faith, his vocal contribution would help those songs be even more effective for those who heard them. Come to find out, at the very last minute (literally), some bass singer got sick and this friend of mine was able to take his place. He was stoked.

**I have another friend in the Choir who, just a few months ago, didn't know for sure whether he'd live to participate in another conference. But the long road he's traveled has led him to have had that opportunity and it was inspiring to watch him sing today.

**President Nelson specifically requested that we change the last song of conference to allow for a little more time to speak. The new closing song was "God Be With You 'Til We Meet Again." My whole family felt, along with some of my siblings, that having that specific song sung was a parting tribute to President Nelson, who would not live to see another conference. (That's purely just a THOUGHT, but since we all had it, and given the way President Nelson gave the final words of his talk, well, it may just come to pass) We all were singing it to him. And he was singing it to us. 😢

**My cousin had this to say about the music: "The messages of conference are so timely and wonderful, but without the music, it wouldn't be conference. The closing hymn (of Sun AM) did me in--I loved the arrangement even more this time....to me, it just made sense of everything in life and gave me courage for the next six months."

**I think I'm slowly, but finally coming back to the truth that fulfilling my calling as a musical missionary NEEDS to be about the music and the message. Sure, some of my wishes for the choir would be cool if they ever came to pass (IMO), and sure, it'd be great if I always personally loved the music we sang. But the fact is, there are many, many people that love what we do, just the way we do it. And I need to trust that if God is at the helm, which I believe Him to be, He'll inspire the program however He sees fit. And in His time. 

Until then, just carry on Ryan! Do your job. And do it well. 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #441 - The Quartet

It's fairly common (from what I've heard and observed over the years) for Tabernacle Choir members to get pulled into other singing opportunities. Such an opportunity came my way today as I got to sing in a quartet at a ward missionary farewell (here's the song we sang). Rehearsals started a few weeks ago and since it was a capella, we wanted to make sure that our harmonies were as spot-on as they could be. Additionally, since I was singing Baritone (which was new to me), I spent quite a bit of on-my-own time getting it down. At any rate, the four of us feel like the performance today went well and enjoyed 1) getting actual feedback afterwards; and 2) getting to sing in a much smaller group where we knew each individual voice really mattered. I mean, I know (and have blogged about it) that each voice matters in the 400-voice Tabernacle Choir. But, if small mistakes are made in a large choir, no one really notices (plus, you have plenty of opportunities to breath!). It's when you're singing your part all by yourself that you feel like the spotlight is on you (and on you the whole time!). 

I suppose it would be well for me to adopt that concept though as I continue my journey in the Choir. Feeling like the spotlight is always on me would prompt me to do certain things: 1) if I didn't exactly know the notes or rhythm at a certain spot in the song, I'd pull out the sheet music and verify instead of just listening around me and self-correcting as I realized what mistakes I made. 2) I'd take my music home every week to look over it. Even if I felt confident in the notes and rhythm, reading over the lyrics and letting them be a part of my week might help me appreciate the songs and their messages all the more (or even at all). 3) I could be one of those singers in my section that leads out instead of follows along. 4) I'd feel the blessings of being fully prepared. I re-recognized that feeling today while singing my part in the quartet. 

I'll try better to do these things. After all, as a disciple of Christ, I should be living as if the spotlight were always on me.
Because it is. 

And now, switching gears a bit to just mention some Choir "odds and ends"...

First, we have been given the opportunity to record a music video with the Piano Guys--soon. It's no small feat to pull off any type of performance with a large choir--so it'll be interesting to see how this goes. I can't say that recording is even remotely associated with the word "fun" (think retake after retake after retake), but the finished product will, I'm sure, be pretty darn cool. If I remember right, the video will be released sometime in 2023. 

Second, we have General Conference coming up. I'd love some time to have the orchestra join us and let the Seventy General Authorities go sit with their wives (the orchestra needs the space they take up), but that's not happening this time. Or probably ever. (Tradition, you know?)  Standard conference music is being rehearsed and I suspect everything will go just as it always goes. 

Third, the announcement for the Christmas Concert guest artist is coming up here soon (I don't know exactly when, but would expect something to come out in October). Choir members have not been told anything about who it will be. But, if I were a gambling man, I'd wager it might just be The Piano Guys. It's not completely without precedent that special guests that join the Choir for Music & the Spoken Word or for the summer concert end up being the guest artist for the Christmas concert. Guess we'll see. Who knows? Maybe it's someone completely off my radar. 

That as they say, is that.
Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #440 - The Virtual Sick Room

I wasn't planning on posting anything today given the fact I missed attending both the in-person rehearsal Thursday and the performance today. But I thought I'd share a few thoughts about what it's like when a choir member gets sick and still tries to fulfill his/her calling.

First of all though, I have to comment on the timing of all of this. Given my attitude and reluctance to be "all-in" with Choir lately, you might think that missing a week would of sort have been a treat for me. Ironically though, I was actually very excited to go to Choir Thursday--for four main reasons.  1) It was the first time back to the Tabernacle after what seemed like a long summer in the Conference Center--and I was anxious to finally be able to look into the faces of those who came to listen to us rehearse. 2) I was going to go early and rehearse a quartet number that a friend of mine invited me to be a part of (to be performed in a sacrament meeting later this month). 3) The songs we were rehearsing for both the performance today and for future broadcasts were songs I really loved. And 4) I was anxious to say hello to my buddy Wes who I hadn't seen for a few weeks. 

But, it was all not to be. 

I started feeling sick on Tuesday and it was clear on Thursday that I was in no condition to go sing. So I contacted an individual on the Choir admin team letting her know I was sick. And she put me in contact with someone on the medical committee who asked about my symptoms and laid out how things would go. Basically, the medical committee is treating every illness as covid-19 and in order to come back, I'd have to have two negative tests within 48 hrs of each other. I could choose not to do the test, but would have to wait longer to come back to ensure I wasn't potentially bringing the virus with me. Anyway, for rehearsal, I received authorization to attend the virtual sick room which is basically just a Zoom meeting that, when logged in, is zoomed in on the conductor leading the Choir. Attending the sick room would allow me to get partial attendance credit. The sick room felt a bit lonely as it wasn't like a typical zoom call. I couldn't see anyone else who was logged in and therefore had no chance to chat about the rehearsal as it went along. However, I knew my friend Willy was in the sick room too so we started up an external chat and enjoyed commenting on the various songs being rehearsed. 

On Saturday, I again contacted "Jill" from the medical committee to let her know I still wasn't feeling that great and she authorized me to attend the sick room again, the next morning (today). She also said I'd need to test Monday and then again on Wednesday if I wanted to come back to choir on Thursday. Willy was again in the virtual room and I later found out Wes was there too. The bonus to being in the sick room today was getting credit for joining the extra post-broadcast rehearsal even though we didn't have to actually stay logged in (technical issues). 

Anyway, I just wanted to give you a glimpse into the "being sick process". Hopefully I'll be back on Thursday and not have to find out anything more about it!  :) 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #439 - The Super Six

A shorter post today, but I did want to mention a few things.

First, I really liked all six songs we sang today. Saints Bound for Heaven brought me back to my Concert Choir days at BYU where I was first introduced to that song and fell in love with it. We Thank Thee Lord for This New Day is a new song by Mack Wilberg that debuted several months ago. I love the harmonics, the changes between major and minor keys, and how it's different from our standard fare. O Come Ye Nations of the Earth talks about letting your light shine. Each of us has something to give and I appreciate that reminder. My Song in the Night is one I've always loved mainly because I feel like, at least for me, much of our lives is spent wading through the dark as we search for more light. I mean, we live in the light that we feel like we have and that light is important to cling to. But there's also our ever growing "faith shelf" which contains oh so many questions and causes us to feel like we're in the dark. Hold On is definitely a favorite musical song with an important message about patience and perseverance. And Come Labor On is a relatively new hymn for me personally, but reminds me of missionary work since my daughter is out serving (Ryan Murphy shared the same sentiment). Apparently this hymn is widely known in other Christian sects--so it's nice to finally know it now myself. And while the message can apply to missionaries, it also applies to each of us since "work" is a very important part of finding happiness.

Second, the Choir started using a new attendance app called "Roll Call". Up until now, there have been designated individuals in each section of the choir that would take attendance the good ol' fashioned way. By observation and pen/paper. This was very time consuming and prone to error. Now we all just scan a QR code on our way in, and then again on our way out, and bam! All done. While the Church (and by extension, the Choir) is always a bit slow to adopt technology, I'm glad we're making progress on this front. Especially, as mentioned before, putting more emphasis on the digital music streaming apps instead of always taking about buying CDs. 

Third, we have a new Director of Travel - Justin Smith. I guess the choir will once again go on tours after all. Some of my choir friends had begun to wonder. 

Fourth, the best part of today? Having my wife surprise me by coming to watch Music & the Spoken Word ! 

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #438 - The Piano Guys

The Piano Guys joined us as guest performers on today's Music & the Spoken Word broadcast. It was truly nice to have them. I think very highly of both Jon and Steven and the great music they share with the world. Seeing them perform brought back some Christmas related memories for me personally since my wife and I, along with several of my siblings and my parents used to get tickets every year to Jon's Christmas show at Kingsbury Hall. Each show he'd delight us with his amazing piano skills and, invariably, he'd have his good friend Steven Sharp Nelson as a guest on the show to share his amazing skills on the cello. Of course that Jon Schmidt Christmas show ended as soon as The Piano Guys became "a thing" and Jon's gone on to enjoy a much wider audience with Steven and the other two members of the group, Paul Anderson and Al van der Beek.

One thing, among many, that impressed me as I observed them both on Thursday night and this morning, was their devotion to God. In the remarks they made at rehearsal and then publicly as part of the Spoken Word portion of the program today, they are always very quick to thank God for their talents and for being able to share their music with others. They are also very quick to ask for God's help before any rehearsal or performance. This was exemplified on Thursday when they came on stage to rehearse the first piece. Minutes before that, the Choir had opened the rehearsal in prayer as we normally do. But as Jon and Steven weren't there for that portion, they didn't know we had prayed. So, after only a minute or so into the rehearsal, Jon piped up and asked Mack Wilberg if we had said a prayer yet. And after Mack assured him that we had, the rehearsal resumed. It reminded me of a scripture from the Book of Mormon that says "...ye must pray always, and...not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul." (and, if I may add, the welfare of others)

A couple of behind-the-scenes comments from Thursday's rehearsal and today's performance:

First, when Jon and Steven were being officially introduced to us Thursday, each of them took a couple of minutes to say a few words. Steven focused on how one of our main goals should be to fill the "music listening space" with wholesome music that the youth can latch onto instead of them listening to much of the popular music today that's explicit in nature (he cited the fact that on Spotify last year, 14 of the top 20 streamed songs had explicit lyrics). While I don't think that the youth out there will start listening (or listen more) to the Tabernacle Choir or The Piano Guys, the message of producing more wholesome content is definitely a good one.

Second, we had lots of people show up today. They filled the entire main floor of the Conference Center and started filling up various sections of the 2nd floor Terrance as well. I got the sense that several who showed up thought that perhaps The Piano Guys would be featured more on the program--as if they'd be performing sort of a mini-concert. While I think it would have been cool for Jon and Steven to maybe do a few numbers themselves after the broadcast for the audience's sake (since the broadcast can't go longer than 30 min), that's not what happened. That said, I hope they focused on what was in front of them: 30 minutes to feel and hear heaven inspired music.

Third, following the broadcast, the audience was invited to stay if they wanted, to watch us record the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel's Messiah.  Apparently at some future point in time, The Piano Guys will be releasing a video that shows them performing the Hallelujah Chorus (on piano and cello of course) and also shows The Tabernacle Choir somehow intermixed with that performance. I'm not sure how the end result will turn out, but knowing The Piano Guys, I'm sure it'll be very cool.

Fourth, the morning ended with Rick Elliott and Jon Schmidt performing a duet of the song "Waterfall"--which is actually one of Jon's signature songs he plays (or used to at his concerts). While I felt like the organ sort of dominated the duet, it was a pretty cool performance. I've always loved that song.

As for me and my current Choir journey, I felt fairly neutral this week. Which is actually an improvement. So I'll take it. While there aren't a lot of unusual or out-of-the-ordinary Choir performances coming up, I'm going to try my best to find whatever magic is in them.

Until next time, God be with you.

 

TCATS #437 - Reclaiming What's Been Lost

For any of you who have followed my blog for at least the past year or so, it should come as no surprise for me to admit that I've had plenty of Ryan-Choir relationship challenges. For most of the pandemic, I was soooo wanting to get back to Choir to do what I loved (sing uplifting music that inspires others). But for almost two years, that never happened and my longing was in vain. It was a terribly difficult time. Then, at long last, we started up again near the end of September! But it was not a normal start-up. No, it came with covid protocols a-plenty. Which, at least for me, completely obliterated any joy I once felt singing with the choir and turned my two year longings into frustrated lamenting. It's true that at some point those covid protocols were nullified and the Choir resumed "normal" operations. But I personally never quite recovered from it all. My varying negative emotions felt during those still-in-covid-but-singing-anyway months persisted. Yes, there were moments I was able to break out of those emotions and feel a level of peace and gratitude while fulfilling my musical missionary calling. And I'm grateful for those moments. But most of the choir train ride I was on, and still am on, was on the bottom of the valley floors instead of traversing through scenic and beautiful mountain vistas.

While going through all of this, I've been really trying hard to adjust my attitude, to "reinvent" my excitement, to look at oft-repeated songs with fresh eyes, and to remember all of the people out there who are deeply moved & impacted by the product the Choir produces. I feel, though, like a yo-yo that occasionally moves upwards along the winding string but just doesn't have enough momentum to make it clear to the top (and then ends up at the end of the string...spinning, but not going anywhere). I've become too critical, too discontent, and too infatuated with a hope that the Choir will be propelled on this new and exciting trajectory. A trajectory that really only exists in my head. 

How silly of me. 

The formula the Choir has prescribed to for the past 90+ years has "worked". And by most measurements (number of streams, number of YouTube views, etc), the formula continues to work. Some could even argue that the slightly modified formula has taken success to a whole new level. And I would agree that the modifications have indeed helped (using the teleprompter so that viewers can look into our eyes more, finally ditching CDs and embracing streaming platforms, involving choir members more in concert narration--to name a few). So why can't I be content and excited with these improvements and finally recapture the joy I once felt? Why can't I be like the new members of the Choir who are all smiles even when they spend ten hours outside of rehearsals to learn music they are unfamiliar with? Or heck, why can't I be like Choir members who have been in Choir as long as I have and STILL dutifully rehearse on their own time during the week, and who come with bright happy attitudes and who love what they do?

It's got to be me. All me. There is no one else to blame.

I think my goal at this point is to see how the rest of this year goes and then perhaps do some serious re-evaluating. Maybe it's time. Maybe it's time to go quietly into the night. I hope not. But if I can't reclaim what's been lost, the Choir organization would have absolutely no problem replacing me with someone who isn't struggling to reclaim anything. Someone who truly loves to be there. Someone who's smile is completely genuine. And someone who will gladly and wholeheartedly work hard to let his musical testimony shine forth into the hearts of those waiting to receive it. 

How I long to be that person again.

Until next time, God be with you.

TCATS #436 - Surprise Visit + Recognizing Ukraine

To be honest, I was in one of those slumps this week. The songs we sang were nice but most we had sung many, many times before. I was looking for change, something new, something exciting. And yes, I know Choir is not about me. I should always put my personal satisfaction way below the needs of our listeners. And yes, I typically believe that with the right attitude, anything can be great. But I'm sorry...none of that was working for me this week. Call me mortal...call me lazy...call me whatever you'd like. But I did not have it in me to be that choir member--the kind who's excited, so thankful, and incredibly thrilled to be there!

But, there are a few things that touched my heart and I'd like to share them with you.

First, near the end of the rehearsal on Thursday night, Mack mentioned there was a surprise. And as he sort of backed away from the podium, up came none other than Kristin Chenoweth. Her comments were brief, but basically she mentioned she is currently working on improving her relationship with God and wanting to listen to Him more and she said that there were few places she could think of that would help her do that better than being with the Tabernacle Choir. So, she took a chair down in the audience seats and spent time just listening to us rehearse. Granted she kept having to greet various people who wanted to come up to her and say hello, but she did get some time to focus on the music. On Sunday, she attended the broadcast and was much more able to hone in on the music. 

I think it's pretty cool that she chose, out of all the places she could have chose, to spend some time with Tabernacle Choir--all in an effort to improve her spirituality and her relationship with the Divine. I sincerely hope she received what she hoped to receive.

Second, on Sunday right before the broadcast started, Lloyd Newell introduced several guests in the audience who had come to listen to Music & the Spoken Word. Of note was the official National Curling Team of Ukraine who was using some of the facilities in the SLC area to train on. Everyone stood and gave them a round of applause. Then, after the broadcast was over, one of our organists Andrew Unsworth, played a personally arranged version of Ukraine's national anthem. It was very touching and several choir members around me had tears come to their eyes just thinking of what these Ukranians, their country, and their loved ones, have been through given the ongoing war there. 

Third, during one of the songs today--one that I didn't expect to really touch me personally--I felt a very comforting warm feeling as I honed in on the lyrics "Pray, He is there. Speak, He is listening. You are His child, His love now surrounds you." Was grateful for that. 

Soooo....all in all, despite my initial unenthusiastic mood, I'm grateful for how things played out. Whether this mood continues, I can't say. But for today, I'll take what was given me and go with it.

Until next time, God be with you.